Dominant Extroverted Intuition [Ne]: All of Bill’s ideas come from things she’s already seen or heard. She suggests that Heather might be possessed, because she saw something on Netflix about lizards in people’s brains. The unknown is exciting for her and she’s stimulated by all of the possibilities. Bill has a miraculously adventurous mind and is thrilled by traveling with the Doctor. She’s intuitive and enjoys theorizing about things. She comes to the conclusion that the Doctor enjoys having the TARDIS disguised as a police telephone box. “Advice and Assistance Obtainable Immediately. You like that.” He is the helpline. Though she barely knows him, she deduces that he doesn’t just “pass by” because he couldn’t even pass her and let her carry on her mundane chip-serving existence. Bill is keenly aware that everything she does in the present has an impact on her future. Bill is constantly rambling on about things. When the Doctor asks her a question, she answers by telling a completely unrelated story that she expects will have a point eventually, but it doesn’t. She’s talkative, energetic, and enjoys speculation. When she tries to decide what’s going on, she displays a tendency to come up with imaginative, fantastical explanations. Does the Doctor have “magical alien powers”? She wants her life to have excitement and is crushed when she realizes the Doctor wants to take away the memory of the most exhilarating experience of her life.
Auxiliary Introverted Thinking [Ti]: Bill is deeply inquisitive and asks questions constantly. She genuinely wants to understand how things work. She calls out logical inconsistencies like it’s her job. If you’re from a different planet, why is the TARDIS named in English? Did it come in a kit? Because it’s too big to get into this room like that. Hey, you said you had to bring it in with a crane, so how did you get a rug underneath it? If it’s supposed to be hidden, why is “pull to enter” written on it? Woah, we’re on another planet? What’s the sky made of? Why don’t you just call the police? Is there a space version of Scotland? If you don’t want anyone getting curious, why would you park the TARDIS in the middle of a university? That doesn’t seem sensible! Why do you have two hearts? Does having two hearts mean you have high blood pressure? What do you mean nothing gets through those doors? They’re made of wood and they have windows! Does nobody notice the TARDIS? Does traveling through time have any side effects? How is that a screwdriver? And how is it sonic? Where should I sit? Where’s the steering wheel? And why are the seats so far away from the console? That’s impractical! Bill naturally sees ways of improving things and brings them to the Doctor’s attention. The Doctor’s initial interest in Bill stems from the fact that she smiles when she doesn’t understand something, while ordinary people typically frown.
Tertiary Extroverted Feeling [Fe]: When asked whether she wants to go to the past or the future, she wants to see the future because she wants to know if it’s a happy place. When the Doctor tries to wipe Bill’s memory, she tries to make an emotional appeal to him, hoping that he will empathize with her. How would you feel if somebody just took the most exciting event of your entire life from you? She has a difficult time digesting the Doctor’s nonchalant demeanor in the face of death. She doesn’t understand how he can just “move on” from it, and tends to process her feelings by asking questions. You’ve seen people die before, but do you still care? How many have you seen die? If you care so much, how many? How quickly do you move on? Have you ever killed? She tells him that she’s wondered about this because of a look she notices in his eye. The Doctor tells Bill to leave the talking to him because she has a temper. Bill is open about her feelings and has no qualms talking to the Doctor about her love life or speaking up when she has moral concerns. After Bill asks the Doctor if he has magical alien powers, she wonders if asking that question was impolite. When the Doctor tells her that the man in the suit is dead, she wants to turn it off because he’s “just standing there” like that. “It’s sick. It’s disrespectful.” When she meets someone with blue skin and yellow eyes, she’s fearful at first, but then insists that she’s not racist, and tries to relate by saying that she’s usually on the receiving end of prejudice.
Inferior Introverted Sensing [Si]: Although Bill was just a baby when her mother passed away, she has constructed an entire relationship with her. She talks to her and even makes things up that she might say. Bill uses her vast knowledge of science fiction in order to make assumptions about what’s happening in the present. She knows that the Doctor is going to wipe her mind because she’s seen it in movies and knows what it looks like. Bill frequently makes comparisons between what she’s currently experiencing and things she’s already experienced. This is just like the Student Union in the morning before everyone else arrives. Oh, and that plant is the same one that grows outside the Union! She’s excited that she can smell home from twenty light years away. She’s excited when she gets to board a “proper” spaceship, because the TARDIS isn’t the kind of spaceship she’s accustomed to seeing on film. She marvels about how the Doctor can just blow something up. If you do that, you’re supposed to get in trouble! That’s how it works. Bill notes that Regency England is a “bit more black than they show in the movies.” She wants to know what the “rules” of time travel are because she has a prior understanding of the butterfly effect and is worried about messing up the future. Although she gets a thrill out of traveling with the Doctor, she wants to maintain her normal life and keep him separate from it.
Enneagram: 7w6 9w1 2w3 Sx/So
The Doctor: I’ve seen you.
Bill: Love your lectures. They’re totally awesome.
The Doctor: Why’d you come to my lectures when you’re not a student?
Bill: Okay, so my first day here, in the canteen, I was on chips. There was this girl. Student. Beautiful. Like a model, only with talking and thinking. She looked at you and you perved. Every time, automatic, like physics. Eye contact, perversion. So I gave her extra chips. Every time, extra chips. Like a reward for all the perversion. Every day, got myself on chips, rewarded her. Then finally, finally, she looked at me, like she’d noticed, actually noticed, all the extra chips. Do you know what I realised? She was fat. I’d fatted her. But that’s life, innit? Beauty or chips. I like chips.
So did she. So that’s okay.
The Doctor: And how does that in any way explain why you keep coming to my lectures?
Bill: Yeah, it doesn’t really, does it? I was hoping something would develop. What’s that? A police telephone box?
The Doctor: Yeah.
Bill: Did you build it from a kit?
The Doctor: No, it came like that.
Bill: Then how did you get it in here? The door’s too small and so are the windows.
The Doctor: I had the window and a part of the wall taken out and it was lifted in.
Bill: What, with a crane?
The Doctor: Yeah, with a crane. It’s heavier than it looks. Why do you keep coming to my lectures?
Bill: Because I like them. Everybody likes them. They’re amazing. Why me?
The Doctor: Why you what?
Bill: Well, plenty of people come to your lectures that aren’t supposed to. Why pick on me?
The Doctor: Well, I noticed you.
Bill: Yeah, but why?
The Doctor: Well, most people when don’t understand something, they frown. You smile.
Bill: I’ll tell you what I don’t understand. You’ve been lecturing here for a long time. Like, fifty years, some people say. Nabeela in the office says over seventy.
The Doctor: Yeah, and you’re thinking, ‘Well, he doesn’t look old enough’.
Bill: No. I’m wondering what you’re supposed to be lecturing on. It’s like the university let you do whatever you like. One time, you were going to give a lecture on quantum physics. You talked about poetry.
The Doctor: Poetry, physics, same thing.
Bill: How is it the same?
Bill: Going anywhere for Christmas?
The Doctor: I never go anywhere.
Bill: That’s not true. You go places, I can tell. My mum always said, ‘With some people you can smell the wind in their clothes.’
The Doctor: Oh. She sounds nice.
Bill: She died when I was a baby.
The Doctor: Oh.
The Doctor: If she died when you were a baby, when did she say that?
Bill: In my head. I’m supposed to look like her, but I don’t really know. There’s hardly any photographs. She hated having her picture taken. But if someone’s gone, do pictures really help?
Bill: Happy new term!
The Doctor: With you in a moment.
[Bill sees that the Tardis is partly sitting on her gift rug.]
Bill: You said you needed a crane to lift your box.
The Doctor: Sorry, what did you say?
Bill: Maybe it’s got to do with that thing in her eye.
The Doctor: How?
Bill: Maybe she’s like, affected by something.
The Doctor: By what?
Bill: I don’t know. Look, I know you know lots of stuff about, well, basically everything, but do you know any sci-fi?
The Doctor: Go on.
Bill: Well, what if she’s possessed. Something like that.
The Doctor: Possessed by what?
Bill: I don’t know. I saw this thing on Netflix. Lizards in people’s brains.
The Doctor: Right. So, you meet a girl with a discoloured iris and your first thought is she might have a lizard in her brain? I can see I’m going to have to up my game. Oh.
The Doctor: Oh!
Bill: What is it, what?
The Doctor: Oh, I get it. I see it. It was easy for your friend because of her eye.
Bill: What, because it gives her special powers?
Bill: How do we stop it getting in? We’re trapped in here!
The Doctor: Nothing gets through these doors.
Bill: But they’re made of wood. They’ve got windows!Look, this is all mad, I know, but that’s the girl I told you about. Heather. Only I don’t think it’s really her. I know this is hard to believe. I know you’re not exactly a sci-fi person- [turns around]
The Doctor: Time And Relative Dimension In Space. TARDIS for short. You’re safe in here. You’re safe in here and you always will be. Any questions?
Bill: Is this a knock-through?
The Doctor: Well, in a way, yes.
Bill: Look at this place. It’s like a
The Doctor: Spaceship.
The Doctor: A what?
Bill: A really posh kitchen, all metal. What happened with the doors, though? Did you run out of money?
The Doctor: What you are standing in is a technological marvel. It is science beyond magic. This is the gateway to everything that ever was, or ever can be.
Bill: Can I use the toilet?
The Doctor: Pardon?
Bill: I’ve had a fright. I need the toilet.
Bill: So your box can move? It can go anywhere it likes?
Nardole: Mmm. Good, innit?
Bill: Anywhere at all, in the whole university?
The Doctor: Is it my imagination, or is this taking longer than normal?
Bill: Hang on. The room’s still inside the box. This isn’t a knock-through.
The Doctor: No.
Bill: Doctor! It’s bigger on the inside than it is on the outside!
Nardole: Way-hey! We got there!
Bill: How is that possible? How do you do that?
The Doctor: Can we shut up, please? Busy, busy. I need to know if there’s any interest in what’s inside this vault.
Bill: Why, what’s inside it?
The Doctor: Something I don’t want anyone being too curious about.
Bill: So you put it in the middle of a university?
Nardole: Ooo, valid point. Yeah, nice.
The Doctor: Either the creature came here specifically for what’s in here, or it’s just a coincidence.
Bill: It’s just a coincidence.
The Doctor: Well, we can’t know that for sure.
Bill: Yeah, we can. It was here for ages before it did anything. If it had work to do, why would it lie around in a puddle?
Bill: TARDIS. If you’re from another planet, why would you name your box in English? Those initials wouldn’t work in any other language!
The Doctor: People don’t generally bring that up.
Bill: It looks like a phone box.
The Doctor: Yes. Er, well, that’s the cloaking device. It sort of hides itself.
Bill: It’s hidden itself as a box with ‘pull to enter’ on the front?
The Doctor: Uh-huh. It’s stuck. It’s supposed to blend in, but it’s, it’s broken.
Bill: So this is somewhere else? This is a different planet? Not Earth, a different one?
The Doctor: That’s the general idea.
Bill: That’s different sky? Is it made of something different? What is sky made of?
The Doctor: Lemon drops.
The Doctor: No, but wouldn’t that be nice?
Bill: What’s up?
The Doctor: I just want to fix something.
[He reaches for her head.]
Bill: Whoa! What are you doing?
The Doctor: Don’t worry. This won’t hurt at all.
Bill: No, but tell me.
The Doctor: Nothing.
Bill: Yeah, because I think you’re going to wipe my memory. I’m not stupid, you know. That’s the trouble with you. You don’t think anyone’s ever seen a movie. I know what a mind-wipe looks like!
The Doctor: I have no choice. I’m here for a reason. I am in disguise. I have promises to keep. No one can know about me.
Bill: This is the most exciting thing that’s ever happened to me in my life. The only exciting thing!
The Doctor: I’m sorry.
Bill: Okay, let me remember just for a week. Just a week. Okay, well, just for tonight. Just one night. Come on, let me have some good dreams for once. Okay. Do what you’ve got to do. But imagine, just imagine how it would feel if someone did this to you. [Bill braces herself with her eyes closed, then he taps her on the chin.]
The Doctor: Get out.
The Doctor: You can keep your memories. Now get out before I change my mind! Don’t speak, don’t start, just run! Now. Go!
Bill: What do we do? Do I have to sit somewhere? Are there seat belts?
The Doctor: Well, you’ve done this before. This isn’t your first trip.
Bill: Yeah, but it’s proper this time. [finds a chair] Oh, that’s a mistake.
The Doctor: What is?
Bill: You can’t reach the controls from the seats. What’s the point in that? Or do you have stretchy arms, like Mister Fantastic?
The Doctor: Oh, I stand, like this.
Bill: You never thought of bringing the seats a bit closer?
The Doctor: No, not so far, no.
Bill: Where’s the steering wheel?
The Doctor: Well, you don’t steer the Tardis, you negotiate with it. The still point between where you want to go and where you need to be, that’s where she takes you.
Bill: How much did it cost?
The Doctor: Ah. No idea. Stole it.
The Doctor: Between here and my office, before the kettle boils, is everything that ever happened or ever will. Make your choice.
Bill: What choice?
The Doctor: Past or future.
The Doctor: Why?
Bill: Why do you think? I want to see if it’s happy.
Bill: These are robots? These are disappointing robots.
The Doctor: That’s a very offensive remark. Don’t make personal remarks like that.
Bill: Er, you can’t offend a machine.
The Doctor: Typical wet brain chauvinism.
Bill: Sorry? Two hearts?
The Doctor: You send a rocketload of intelligent robots up ahead of you. They build you a place to live, so that, when you arrive, it’s all waiting. This is brilliant!
Bill: You, you, you’ve got two hearts?
The Doctor: Robots, they don’t breathe. They can fix the atmosphere for you, send data back, so you know whether to bring your waterproofs or not. Work in huge robot flocks. You just send them up ahead and you leave them to it.
Bill: Yeah. Hearts, though. Why two?
The Doctor: Well, why one?
Bill: Does that mean you’ve got really high blood pressure?
Bill: Oh, this plant! There’s one of these growing outside the Student Union. It smells amazing.
The Doctor: Rosemary.
Bill: I’m smelling home twenty light years from home. Thanks for bringing me. This is a great day out. I mean, come on, admit it. You love it.
Bill: Why are you Scottish?
The Doctor: I’m not Scottish, I’m just cross.
Bill: Is there a Scotland in space?
The Doctor: They’re all over the place, demanding independence from every planet that they land on. Why are you here?
Bill: Because I figured out why you keep your box as a phone box.
The Doctor: I told you, it’s stuck.
Bill: Advice and Assistance Obtainable Immediately. You like that.
The Doctor: No, I don’t.
Bill: See, this is the point. You don’t call the helpline because you are the helpline.
The Doctor: Don’t sentimentalise me. I don’t just fly around helping people out.
Bill: What are you doing right now?
The Doctor: I happened to be passing by, so I’m mucking in.
Bill: You’ve never passed by in your life. You couldn’t even leave me serving chips, so I’m not going to leave you.
Bill: Wait, you want to go out there?
The Doctor: You don’t?
Bill: It’s 1814. [Bill points to her face.]
The Doctor: Yes?
Bill: Slavery is still totally a thing.
The Doctor: Yes, so it is.
Bill: It might be, like, dangerous out there.
Bill: Doesn’t anyone notice the Tardis?
The Doctor: Your species hardly notices anything.
Bill: So, what are the rules?
The Doctor: Rules?
Bill: Yeah. Travelling to the past, There’s got to be rules. If I step on a butterfly, it could send ripples through time that mean I’m not even born in the first place and I could just disappear.
The Doctor: Definitely. I mean, that’s what happened to Pete.
The Doctor: Your friend, Pete. He was standing there a moment ago, but he stepped on a butterfly and now you don’t even remember him.
Bill: Shut up! I’m being serious!
The Doctor: Yeah, so was Pete.
Bill: You know what I mean. Every choice I make in this moment, here and now, could change the whole future.
The Doctor: Exactly like every other day of your life. The only thing to do is to stop worrying about it.
Bill: Hmm. Okay. If you say so.
The Doctor: Pete’s stopped worrying.
Bill: Regency England. Bit more black than they show in the movies.
The Doctor: So was Jesus. History’s a whitewash.
Bill: Are there side-effects to time travel? Like, physical symptoms?
Bill: Does it matter? The boy’s the one with your magic wand.
The Doctor: Sonic screwdriver.
Bill: How is that a screwdriver?
The Doctor: In a very broad sense.
Bill: All right, how’s it sonic?
The Doctor: It makes a noise.
The Doctor: What’s wrong?
Bill: What’s wrong? Seriously, what’s wrong? I’ve never seen anyone die before.
The Doctor: A few hours ago, we were standing in a garden full of dead people.
Bill: That was different.
The Doctor: How?
Bill: They were dead already.
The Doctor: Morally and practically, that is not a useful distinction. Unlearn it.
Bill: Don’t tell me what to think.
The Doctor: I’m your teacher. Telling you things is what I do.
Bill: Yeah? Tell me this. You’ve seen people die before, yeah?
The Doctor: Of course.
Bill: You still care?
The Doctor: Of course I care.
Bill: How many?
The Doctor: How many what?
Bill: If you care so much, tell me how many people you’ve seen die?
The Doctor: I don’t know.
Bill: Okay. How many before you lost count?
The Doctor: I care, Bill, but I move on.
Bill: Yeah? How quickly?
The Doctor: It’s not me you’re angry with.
Bill: Have you ever killed anyone? There’s a look in your eyes sometimes that makes me wonder. Have you?
The Doctor: There are situations when the options available are limited.
Bill: Not what I asked.
The Doctor: Sometimes the choices are very-
Bill: That’s not what I asked!
The Doctor: Yes.
Bill: How many?
Bill: Don’t tell me. You’ve moved on.
The Doctor: Bill, I need you to leave the talking to me.
The Doctor: Because you have a temper.
Bill: Oh okay, well, I lost it a tiny bit.
Bill: You should hire this out, like a removal service.
The Doctor: Removals? Bill, I’m a Time Lord.
Bill: Time Lord? What’s that, your job?
The Doctor: No. It’s, er, my people, my species.
Bill: Doesn’t sound like a species. Sounds posh, like, yes, my lord. Doff my cap.
The Doctor: Oh, well, that’s why I gave it up. Ran away.
Bill: Time Lords. That’s hilarious. Do you wear robes and big hats?
Bill: That tower. It was at the back of the building. Logically, the door should be at the end of this corridor. Look for a way in!
[They run to the bookcase at the end of the corridor and pull at the books.]
Bill: Indiana Jones, come on!
[Bill finds the book that opens the secret door and reveals a flight of stairs.]
Bill: Why not? What have you got up your sleeve? Oh, my God! Have you been holding out on me? Do you have, like, magical, alien powers?
[He huffs on the diving helmet and polishes the faceplate.]
Bill: What, was that an impolite question?
Bill: Why aren’t we floating?
The Doctor: Artificial gravity.
[Bill does a couple of test jumps.]
Bill: Doesn’t feel like space.
[She looks out of a porthole, and grins.]
Bill: Aw! Now it feels like space!
Bill: Yeah, can you turn it off?
Nardole: Turn what off?
Bill: The suit. Just, please, just, just turn it off.
The Doctor: Why?
Bill: He’s just standing there. It’s sick. It’s disrespectful.
Bill: Well, look, can we just, like, lie him down or something? I mean, this isn’t right.
[The person who let them in takes Bill’s arms. His blue skin and yellow eyes startle her.]
Bill: Wha! Sorry, I wasn’t expecting. Hello.
Dahh-ren: Great. We rescued a racist.
Bill: What? Excuse me?
Tasker: And you are?
The Doctor: We got your distress call.
Bill: Sorry. It’s just I haven’t seen many, well, any of your people.
Dahh-ren: It shows.
Bill: Look, for the record, I’m not prejudiced. I’m usually on the receiving end.
Dahh-ren: Oh? Why?
Bill: What, you really don’t know?
Bill: What happens if I throw up in my helmet?
Nardole: Colour and smells.
Bill: Don’t throw up in helmet then. Check.