Abe Weissman (The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel): ISTJ

Dominant Introverted Sensing [Si]: Abe is a creature of habit. He has his routine and greatly resents having it disrupted. He always reads in this room after dinner, so Ethan cannot have the television on in there! The thought of reading in a different room is simply absurd to him. Abe doesn’t enjoy compromising and wants things to be exactly as he’s used to. “This is how I live my life” and that’s that. He refuses to get a second television to put in Midge’s room because he’s not the sort of man who has two TVs. Abe is big on making comparisons. When he was Ethan’s age, he could re-sole a shoe. Abe is extremely traditional and the thought of Midge and Joel separating is simply unacceptable. She’ll just have to figure out a way to win him back. They can’t possibly get divorced. Abe uses things he’s seen or heard in the past in oder to handle situations in the present. If this way of completing a task worked in that situation, we can easily just apply it again now and get the same results.

Auxiliary Extroverted Thinking [Te]: It’s important for Abe to be efficient and pragmatic. He’s unable to sit back and watch people do things the wrong way when he knows the quickest and easiest way of accomplishing a task. When he overhears Midge and Imogene struggling to put together the gift bags for the birthday party, he steps in and shows them how to do things the right way. “Set up a line like Henry Ford. Then pass the bags from one to the other. Candy cigarettes, pass the bag, silly putty, pass the bag, and so on.” Asserting his dominance as the head of the household and being the boss are crucial for Abe. He sets the rules. It’s his show and everyone else would do well to remember that! “I still control this house. I’m just doing it from in here.” When Abe believes that there’s no change of Midge and Joel getting back together, he takes the most logical action: inviting an acquaintance (who happens to be a divorce lawyer) over for dinner…

Tertiary Introverted Feeling [Fi]: … However, because Abe prefers to do instead of discuss, Rose and Midge are appalled that he had the nerve to go out and do a thing like that without consulting them first. Abe is pretty reserved emotionally and doesn’t really express his feelings. On the rare occasions that he does, he tends to demonstrate them through actions rather than words. When Rose guilts him because he hasn’t done anything to help Midge, he tries to help in a practical way as opposed to offering emotional support. He goes to Moishe and convinces him to split the cost of Midge and Joel’s apartment with him, so that their home will be waiting if and when they reconcile. Abe values marriage, and wants Midge to do whatever it takes to get Joel to come home, even though he was the one having the affair and he was the one who walked out on her when she had done nothing wrong. At times, Abe can be fiercely protective of the people he loves

Inferior Extroverted Intuition [Ne]: Opening himself up to new things and dealing with change aren’t exactly Abe’s strong suits. He prefers what he’s familiar with. Unpredictability and disruptions in his usual schedule are stressful. He’s not very open to other people’s point of view because he tends to have trouble seeing beyond his own subjective impressions of people and situations. Abe is rather close-minded and tends to feel that he knows best without bothering to be objective and hear other people out. Although he isn’t very open to listening to those he disagrees with he is able to come around eventually, and even becomes willing to support Midge by setting up the meeting with the divorce lawyer so she can begin to move on with her life.

Enneagram: 6w5 8w9 3w2 Sp/So

Lucas Sinclair (Stranger Things): ISTJ

Dominant Introverted Sensing [Si]: Lucas puts a lot of faith in his former experiences. He will only trust something that he’s seen with his own two eyes, and doesn’t tend to speculate beyond what he knows, which is always based on sensory data he’s collected and stored. All he actually saw Eleven do was close a door! They have no way of knowing whether she’s capable of doing anything more than that! Shutting one door doesn’t mean she’ll be able to protect them when they go looking for Will. They need real, practical weapons if they want to defend themselves! “She’s not a superhero. She’s a weirdo.” When he sees Will’s body, that’s it. He’s dead and he isn’t coming back. While Dustin is more open to possibilities and starts to believe Mike might be right about Will still being out there, Lucas is unable to get around the fact that they saw Will’s body being removed from the water. Lucas doesn’t have positive feelings towards Eleven right off the bat like Mike does. He can’t trust her; he doesn’t even know her. She could be (and probably is) a psychopath for all he knows! Instead, he slowly learns to regard her as an ally, and later as a friend as he continues to interact with her over an extended period of time. He doesn’t begin to fully trust her until she stops the bullies from harassing them. Once she proves herself, Lucas changes his tune and begins to see her differently. While Mike and Dustin are usually more concerned with the big picture, Lucas thinks about the details of a situation. Yeah, using Mr. Clarke’s radio is all well and good and everything, but it’s at school. And we can’t bring Eleven there looking like that. She’ll draw way too much unwanted attention! Yeah, you get to the Vale of Shadows by casting Shadow Walk in the game, but how do we get to the Upside Down in real life?

Auxiliary Extroverted Thinking [Te]: The facts of a situation are important to Lucas. The Demogorgon isn’t real, it’s fictional! Lucas brings practical supplies (weapons) so that they can defend themselves if they find themselves up against whoever or whatever took Will. Lucas doesn’t sugarcoat the truth and has no problem telling it exactly the way it is, regardless of whether the people around him get offended. While Mike tiptoes around Eleven’s feelings and doesn’t want to scare her, Lucas charges right at her and demands to know what she knows about Will. If Dustin is being a sissy, Lucas will tell him to either cut it out or go home. Lucas doesn’t like when things don’t go according to plan. They went out to look for Will and came back with Eleven. She’s not their problem, Will is! They should be focusing on finding him, not adding to their list of problems! The logical thing is to just tell Mike’s mother about Eleven and let her deal with it, so they can get back to searching for their friend. “All that matters is, after school, the freak will be back in the loony bin, and we can focus on what really matters, finding Will.” Lucas is okay with taking charge of a situation and saying, “This is the plan. This is what we’re going to do.” However, he is often outvoted by Mike and Dustin, who are less realistic about things than he is.

Tertiary Introverted Feeling [Fi]: Although it’s clear to Mike that Eleven needs their help, Lucas doesn’t want anything to do with her. Lucas cares very much about his friends, but doesn’t usually go out of his way for anyone he doesn’t have a personal connection to. He will do whatever it takes to find Will because Will is his friend. He doesn’t know Eleven, so he doesn’t feel the need to protect her. And her head is shaved like the people at the nut house, so there’s a very real possibility she escaped from there! Lucas doesn’t want to get mixed up with a crazy person. He wouldn’t want Eleven in his house, even though it’s very obvious to Mike that she’s terrified and needs to be helped. Lucas approaches morality in a completely subjective way. When Will rolls a seven and gets caught by the Demogorgon, he tells Will that the seven didn’t count as long as Mike didn’t see it (though Will fesses up and tells Mike the truth anyway). Although Lucas can cling to his convictions about things and people, he is capable of changing his opinion and apologizing when he is confronted with hard evidence that he was wrong.

Inferior Extroverted Intuition [Ne]: It’s hard for Lucas to theorize and come up with ideas, which Mike and Dustin manage to do with ease. Rather, Lucas tends to keep the other two boys grounded. He doesn’t want to get ahead of himself with baseless speculation. Lucas wants to be practical and realistic, and is often irked when the other two start spewing what he considers to be nonsense. Lucas is capable of coming up with theories, but only if there’s some sort of precedent. Eleven’s hair is shaved and doesn’t seem sane to him, so it’s very possible that she escaped from Pennhurst. While he doesn’t jump on Mike and Dustin’s abstract discussions as readily, he is able to follow along with their train of thought and fine-tune their more far-fetched ideas. Lucas is okay with using his imagination every now and then (such as when he’s playing Dungeons & Dragons with his friends), but it isn’t his main approach to life. He uses it more for recreational purposes than to solve real-world problems.

Enneagram: 6w7 8w9 3w4 Sp/Sx

Chris Halliwell (Charmed): INTJ

Dominant Introverted Intuition [Ni]: Chris is singularly focused on preventing Wyatt from becoming evil in order to save the world from him. He is so caught up in his mission that he often fails to think of anything else, often overworking the sisters in order to reach his goal. He doesn’t stop to consider their feelings, their needs, or their desires, because he sees the big picture and will stop at nothing. We need to make preemptive strikes to prevent that future from happening, otherwise we’re all doomed! Chris is extremely conscious of how anything he says or does can potentially impact the future, and always exercises caution about what he reveals to Piper, Phoebe, Paige, and Leo. He initially allows them all to think that his reason for coming back to the past is to save Wyatt… but he fails to mention that what he’s saving him from is becoming evil, because if he said that, they wouldn’t believe him, and they certainly wouldn’t help him. He only tells them the truth when he has no other choice but to come clean with them. He doesn’t reveal that he’s actually Piper and Leo’s son because he is aware that doing so could lead to serious consequences, and doesn’t fess up about his actual identity until Phoebe asks him point blank. He understands how events can unfold and often uses that foreknowledge to his advantage. When he and the sisters find themselves saddled with a demonic baby, Chris immediately wants to vanquish it. Piper, Phoebe, and Paige see an innocent child, but Chris sees what it’s going to become. You can’t see it for what it is now, you have to look at what it’s going to be when it grows up! You can’t let it live!

Auxiliary Extroverted Thinking [Te]: For Chris, it’s all business, all the time. He has no patience when the girls get distracted. You need to be taking this seriously. Ugh Fine, maybe we can talk about taking a little break after you’ve killed three more demons. Chris likes to keep everyone on target and wants Piper, Phoebe, and Paige to stay focused on the task at hand. There isn’t time for distractions! Chris is good at organizing his environment, as well as the people in it, in order to achieve something. He is often the one who develops plans of attack, which he expects them to follow exactly as he commands. Chris is always thinking about what he wants to accomplish, and what he needs the Charmed Ones to do in order to see his plans executed in the way he envisions them, and doesn’t typically allow emotions to influence his decisions. Chris gets annoyed when the sisters allow their emotions to keep them from doing what needs to be done and tells them flat out to get over it and move on. There are more important things to be concerned with! The facts of the situation are important to Chris and he often has trouble seeing around them. When Paige insists on going to find Leo where the crystal pointed to, Chris tries to talk her out of it. It’s pointing to the middle of the Indian Ocean, Paige! You can’t orb there! However Paige believes that something must be there and goes anyway. Chris tends to go for the simple, straightforward solution to problems rather than thinking of creative solutions. In his mind, the only way to stop the baby from growing up to become a demonic killer is to just vanquish it now before it has the chance to do any damage as an adult. When his conception date draws near and he comes into contact with a Genie, he believes the logical thing to do is just wish for Piper and Leo to have sex.

Tertiary Introverted Feeling [Fi]: It is Chris’s ability to put his plan above all else that leads him to carry weight of the truth about the future by himself. For a very long time, he refrains from telling his own mother about her untimely demise. He internalizes a lot of his negative feelings instead of discussing them openly. Although he doesn’t talk about his emotions, he does tend to act on the anger and resentment that he feels, particularly towards Leo. When Chris is faced with a moral decision, he looks at the future implications first and foremost (Ni-Fi). He has no qualms about killing if it’s to stop Wyatt from becoming evil, because it’s for the greater good. Chris tends to see things as being black and white. The baby has to die in order to spare potential future victims! It doesn’t matter that it’s just a child! It’s a demons. Demons are evil. Therefore, it needs to die. Case closed. You can’t be sentimental about this! Chris has trouble empathizing and dealing with the girls when they become emotional about anything. He can’t relate, because everything he does is in service of a better future, so he lacks the time or patience for such trivial problems

Inferior Extroverted Sensing [Se]: It’s impossible for Chris to relax and live in the moment. When the girls try to get him to take a load off, he refuses to, because he has a job to do. He’s not here to enjoy himself, he has a purpose. There’s no time for sensory pleasure or fun. He doesn’t want to loosen up or let the sisters enjoy their lives because there’s work to be done. You need to concentrate on saving Wyatt! Stay focused, guys! Sometimes, Chris is able to improvise in the moment when necessary. On rare occasions (particularly when under stress), Chris can behave recklessly without regard for the potential consequences. Although Chris spends a lot of time coming up with plans and strategies, he sometimes just wants to charge in guns blazing and get things done (Te-Se). “I don’t understand. Why don’t we just storm the place and find her? It’s not like we don’t know where she is.” Every now and then, Chris is able to lighten up and live a little, such as engaging in highly inappropriate sexual relations with his newly assigned charge.

Note: Though I haven’t seen many typings for Chris, the few that I have seen typically type him as an ISFP. When I typed him based on memory, I thought that would be my typing for him as well, but I went back and watched many of his scenes again, and there’s just no way. All the functions are there, but Ni and Te are definitely running the show.

Enneagram: 6w5 1w2 3w2 Sp/So

Sutton Brady (The Bold Type): ISFJ

Dominant Introverted Sensing [Si]: It’s hard for Sutton to break out of her comfort zone. She’s spent three years on Lauren’s desk, and even though her dream is to work in fashion, she’s too “realistic” to pursue it. Because Sutton spent her entire life being the adult in her relationship with her mother, she is hesitant when it comes to doing anything that might be considered impractical. She is hardworking, committed, and highly organized. Her past is important to her and her experiences define who she is. She’s sentimental and has a great memory, particularly for things that are personally significant to her. When she tries to make a board for Oliver, she doesn’t make it personal enough at first, and focuses more on what she thinks he wants to see. When she takes another stab at it, though, she makes it reflect who she is by decorating it with the U2 shirt she was wearing when her mother told her she couldn’t afford to send her to college. She uses her prom dress, her diary, and other physical, deeply personal items from her past to show Oliver who she is. Sutton loves fashion and uses clothing to express herself. She is reliable and wants to show people they can depend on her. Sutton has a keen eye for detail. She has trouble being able to enjoy porn because of the poor production values and would much rather use erotica.

Auxiliary Extroverted Feeling [Fe]: Sutton is encouraging, affirming, and supportive. When her friends achieve something, she is proud of them and celebrates their success. She wants to offer them help when they’re struggling, and will drop everything to be there for them. Sutton goes out of her way for other people and wants to be liked. She is very conscious of other people’s feelings and doesn’t like to make them angry or upset with her. She might think something negative, but she doesn’t typically say it aloud if it might hurt someone or cause conflict, which she hates. When Sutton has a moral dilemma, she asks her friends what they think she should do about it and listens to their opinions. She doesn’t know what to do when she realizes that Oliver is only considering her for the position she applied for because he thinks she went to FIT, and has trouble deciding whether or not to come clean with him. Sutton is in tune with the emotions of those around her and tries to get them to be okay with what they’re feeling. She tells Jane that it’s alright if she’s not fine. You don’t have to be fine! Sutton is comfortable with expressing what she’s feeling and encourages those around her to do the same. She can also easily discern what another person might have been feeling when they made a particular decision.

Tertiary Introverted Thinking [Ti]: It’s usually easy for Sutton to figure out the logical thing to do. Sutton is witty and usually has a quick, sarcastic remark for most situations. She’s good at analyzing situations and coming up with correct assumptions, particularly about the people around her. Sutton is particularly good at coming up with resolutions to interpersonal problems. When Kat is having trouble figuring out what to do about Adena, she initially suggests just asking her how she feels, but then she gets the idea to use the letter Adena asked Kat to write as an excuse to get together so Kat can use that time together to see how she feels. Although she sometimes lacks confidence in herself, Sutton is usually certain that she can come up with a way to solve whatever problem she faces. When Oliver finds out that Sutton allowed him to think she went to FIT when she didn’t, Sutton accepts responsibility for her actions and sets out to work on a way to get him to hire her despite her lie, and ends up being successful. Things that other people say sometimes give Sutton a “lightbulb” moment, allowing her to come up with the solution to her problem (Si-Ti). When Sutton loses $5,000 worth of jewelry that she was supposed to procure for Oliver in a cab, it isn’t until Alex says “Big brother’s always watching” that she thinks to go back to where she got out of the cab and check for security cameras that might’ve recorded her that day.

Inferior Extroverted Intuition [Ne]: Although it may take some time for her to do it, Sutton is able to take risks. She keeps a $100 bill with her at all times, so that if she fails, she can buy a ticket back to her hometown, but eventually decides to apply for a new job and spends the money on a bottle of celebratory champagne and makes a toast to “crazy dreams.” The unknown is often frightening for her and she likes having a safety net. However, Sutton is creative (as evidenced by her fashion board), and is capable of taking chances (though, she only does so after intense deliberation). Sutton makes connections in her mind, typically to things she’s seen, read, or heard in the past, and typically uses them in her sense of humor (Si-Ne). Sutton can sometimes have trouble making decisions, particularly when she must decide between something practical and stable, and something new and unknown. When she’s offered the job she wanted “more than she’s ever wanted anything,” she reconsiders taking it once she realizes it pays less than her current job.

Enneagram: 6w7 3w2 1w9 Sp/So

Note: Sutton’s gut type is either 9 or 1. Whichever wing she has is very strong, so it’s difficult to decide. If you look at the 1 versus the 9 individually, she seems to fit 9 more, but if you look at the archetypes for 136 and 369, Sutton fits with 136 a lot better.


Sutton: When we started together as assistants, I had no idea that you guys would also become my very best friends. Jane, we’re so happy for you and so incredibly proud.

Kat: I’m gonna persuade that artist to be in the magazine.
Sutton: Oh, no Kat. I would let it go. Lauren was not happy today.
Kat: Well that’s just because she’s threatened by anyone young with ambition.
Sutton: Well, Jacqueline wasn’t happy about it, either.
Kat: Well, she wasn’t happy about the interruption. But she was basically telling me to go after that story.
Sutton: I wanna be as confident as her. How did she get to be so confident?

Jane: God, it’s so weird being back here. I mean, how many hours did I spend hanging out on those steps with him? It’s okay, it’s okay. No need to be melodramatic. I’m fine.
Sutton: Jane, he’s the first guy that you said “I love you” to. It’s okay to not be fine.
Jane: But I’m seriously fine.

Sutton: Kat, where are you going?
Kat: I don’t know, okay? I don’t know. I need to go to the consolate or… or call the… I don’t know. I just – I need to do something.
Sutton: There’s nothing you can do.
Jane: It’s gonna be okay.
Kat: They could send her to jail forever or worse and it is completely my fault.
Sutton: Hey, it is not your fault.
Kat: Yes it is! I gave her the vibrator. It was my idea to smuggle them in all because I- I just – I need to fix this.
Jane: No, what you need to do right now is just scream. When I was a kid in Colorado, I would hike up the mountains and scream. Just let it out.
Kat: Well that is a beautiful story, Jane, but unfortunately this is not Colorado, this is New York City and there is literally nowhere in this entire city where people aren’t always on top of you.

Sutton: We’re just trying to help you.
Kat: What are you gonna do to help, Sutton? You gonna call your boyfriend and see if maybe he can fix the problem for me? I gotta go.
Sutton: You know what, if she wants to go through this alone, let her.

Sutton: I wanna be the girl you can’t stop thinking about. I deserve that.

Kat: Men are always such a let down. I can get the job done better myself.
Sutton: That’s because you never stick around long enough. Takes time to train them.

Kat: Why don’t you just admit that you want to work in fashion?
Sutton: Everybody wants to work in fashion, but it requires this little magical thing called talent.
Kat: You have talent.

Sutton: My mother is complicated. I had to be the adult. It made more sense for me to do something practical.

Sutton: Honestly, it’s the production value of half of this stuff that turns me off. Give me an erotic novel any day of the week.
Jane: Wait you like-
Sutton: Get myself off to high-end errogenous literature? Oh, yeah. Henry Miller, am I right?

Sutton: No way. I mean, even if I could get a foot in the door, there’s no money in it. Unless you really make it, which, I mean, the odds of that happening are basically zero.

Sutton: I just feel like they don’t know what this could mean for me. Kat, especially. She’s never had to worry about money. She doesn’t have student loans and a mom who can’t pay her own bills. This job could literally change my life.

Alex: Okay, forget the money. What’s your dream?
Sutton: Fashion. I’ve always loved it. But it’s too risky, you know? I can’t afford to fail and there are practicalities that I need to consider.

Kat: God, I feel like such an idiot. I just completely misread that whole situation.
Sutton: You’re not an idiot.
Jane: No, you’re not. I mean, you’re the bravest person I know. You take risks and you put yourself out there. I mean, I wish I could be more like you.
Sutton: Yeah. Me too.
Kat: Like I said, you gotta do something crazy.
Jane: I can. And I will.

Alex: What are we drinking to?
Sutton: Crazy dreams.

Sutton: I am not gonna let her hold me back.
Jane: Good for you, babe.
Sutton: Oh, I am going full Hamilton on this. Cause I’m the definition of young, scrappy, and hungry, and I’m out.

Jane: Huff Po did a profile on the congresswoman, and it was basically what I was gonna write, excpet they actually got a quote.
Sutton: Oh, man. That’s awful.
Jane: It is what it is. So I’m doing a piece on congressional fashion.
Sutton: Yeah, that’s what I was talking about. That jumpsuit is beyond awful.
Jane: Okay, you’re part of the problem. You should be criticizing her politics, not her pantsuits. I mean, look at these comments. They’re just… mean.
Sutton: A walking popsicle? A Star Trek reject on acid? How much do people suck on the internet this week?
Jane: This was the day that she decided to roll back the Clean Water Act… but instead of talking about that, they’re all talking about this hideous lime green situation. And then she turned around and said that she was being unfairly attacked as a woman, and that became a story.
Sutton: I mean, I would never say this to her, and I would never put it on the internet, but to you I’ll say: that’s a terrible color for an adult. How does she not know that?
Jane: I think she does. Here. “So when I choose an outfit, I’m always thinking, what am I trying to communicate? How can I use fashion to my advantage?
Sutton: What are you doing?
Jane: I’m seeing what she wore when she did that press conference defending the Keystone Pipeline. Ha! It’s hideous.
Sutton: It is hideous.
Jane: She is using fashion as a smokescreen.
Sutton: That’s kind of genius.
Jane: And I have my article.

Sutton: I have to tell him. I have to tell him, right?
Jane: Yes.
Kat: No.

Jane: Stop making excuses. You rewarded yourself, which you deserve to do.

Sutton: I hate conflict. And I don’t want Oliver to think that I’m not grateful.

Sutton: You’re really good at your job.

Kat: Hey, so according to this, I have to speak to Adena’s unique skills. Okay, see, now it makes sense why she wants me to do it… “and submit on official letterhead.”
Sutton: Sorry, not seeing the significance here.
Kat: God, it is a dark day when I’m the most legit person in someone’s life.
Sutton: Or she really cares about the way that you see her.
Kat: You know, I cannot get a read on her.
Sutton: It’s a crazy idea, but you could ask her how she feels. Or better yet, use the letter as an excuse to hang out.
Kat: Sutton Brady, are you asking me to lie?
Sutton: No. Definitely not. But I am telling you to use the situation to your advantage. Tell her that you want to get the letter right, but you have questions, and then while you’re asking those questions… see how you feel.
Kat: You know, that’s actually not a bad idea.

Oliver: So… this is it?
Sutton: This is it.
Oliver: I can really see the FIT influence.
Sutton: You can?
Oliver: Sutton, I’m gonna ask you a question. Did you really go to FIT?
Sutton: Uh, no. And I know that I should have said something as soon as-
Oliver: But you didn’t. In fact, your opening move in our relationship was to lie to me.
Sutton: I know. I don’t know why-
Oliver: Neither do I, Sutton. Thank you.

Richard: Sutton, I am so sorry.
Sutton: No, it’s my fault. And I’m gonna deal with this myself.

Jane: What are you doing?
Sutton: I was so close, Jane. I finally found something that I really want. Something that I’m actually good at. And you’re right. I can do this. And if I’m gonna go down, I’m gonna go down swingin’. So, I have to show Oliver who I really am.
Jane: Okay, but what is… all this?
Sutton: Well, that’s obviously my prom dress.
Jane: Oh, obviously.
Sutton: You know. And in here… is the U2 tanktop that I was wearing when my mom told me she couldn’t afford to send me to college.
Jane: Did you bedazzle it yourself?
Sutton: Yeah. And this is… my high school diary.
Jane: Oh, it’s a letter from your dad.
Sutton: Yeah… I just feel like if I’m gonna lose this job, it’s gonna be me who loses this job. You know? Not some fake FIT girl.

Kat: Jane, in 1986, seven New York women on a picnic were charged for showing “that portion” of the breast below the top of the areola. They appealed, and they won!
Sutton: Yeah.
Kat: Women fought for our right to do this.
Sutton: Anywhere in New York that a man can take his top off, so can a woman. It’s the law. And I respect the law.
Kat: This is our contribution in an ongoing mission to fight for women’s breast health and breast equality.
Jane: Oh, come on! You’re just whipping your boobs out.
Kat: Uh, yeah.
Sutton: Sure.
Jane: That is our water delivery guy. You guys are gonna flash the water delivery guy?
Kat: It’s just a breast, Jane.
Jane: Exactly. Which is why mine are going to stay in my bra where they belong. You two guys have fun though.
Kat: Oh, yeah! I am!
Sutton: Feels good!

Sutton: That’s been my desk for the past three years. And now I’m gonna keep walkin’.

Sutton: And I can’t stop hearing the recording of the mayor’s voice saying “Don’t forget your belongings.” I hated that thing! It freaks me out. It made me feel like he was watching me.
Alex: Oh, big brother’s always watching.
Sutton: You! That’s it. I have to go back to where the cab dropped me off. Do you wanna come?

Megara (Hercules): ISTP

Dominant Introverted Thinking [Ti]: Meg has a quick wit, which she frequently uses to insult those around her. She’s logical, independent, and doesn’t rely on anyone to save her. When she first meets Hercules, she believes she can deal with Nessus on her own, telling him that she’s capable of handling the situation herself. She has confidence in her ability to come up with solutions to her problems without any help. Meg prefers to remain detached and doesn’t want to grow too close to Hercules. She’s clever and comes up with several ways to manipulate Hercules (claiming that she has “weak ankles” as a segue to get Hercules to open up about his own weaknesses). Meg is cynical, snarky, and believes that it’s best to isolate herself so that nobody can hurt her.

Auxiliary Extroverted Sensing [Se]: It’s easy for Meg to use what is immediately available to her accomplish a task. She manipulates Hercules using her sexuality. When Hades tasks Meg with finding out his weakness, she does so by persuading him to play hooky with her and shows him a fun-filled day. Though it’s never stated, one might infer that Meg purposely tripped down the steps in order to start a conversation with Hercules about weaknesses because she was trying to get him to admit his. Meg is comfortable in risky situations and can make shortsighted decisions without considering the ramifications when presented with an opportunity (selling her soul to Hades in exchange for her boyfriend’s life). She’s quick to leap into action (hopping onto Pegasus to get Phil in order to save Hercules, even though she’s terrified of heights). She also notices the pillar about to fall and crush Hercules and is able to push him out of the way in the nick of time, saving his life.

Tertiary Introverted Intuition [Ni]: Meg is driven by one goal – work off her debt and eventually be free from Hades forever. She experiences flashes of insight – she can tell relatively quickly that Hercules isn’t like everybody else and believes in him. Meg is good at knowing how to manipulate people and instinctively knows which buttons to push. Once Meg falls for Hercules, she becomes determined to protect him from Hades, regardless of the consequences. Meg appears to believe in universal truths about the world and humanity (everyone is petty and dishonest).

Inferior Extroverted Feeling [Fe]: Admitting her feelings doesn’t come easily for Meg. Instead, she keeps them hidden and denies the truth. Although she was working with Hades to obtain her freedom, in the end, she sacrifices herself to save Hercules. Meg is willing to make selfless choices for those she loves – she’s only a slave to Hades because she sold her soul to him in an attempt to save her boyfriend’s life. Although Meg doesn’t lead with her emotions, she is able to tap into them, as she puts on quite a performance for Hercules in order to convince him to come save the two little boys (Pain and Panic), who were supposedly trapped as a result of a rock slide.

Enneagram: 6w5 8w7 4w5 Sp/Sx


Hercules: Pardon me, my good, uh… uh… sir. I’ll have to ask you to release that young –
Megara: Keep movin’, junior.
Hercules: — lady. But you… are-aren’t you… a damsel in distress?
Megara: I’m a damsel. I’m in distress. I can handle this. Have a nice day.

Megara: Megara. My friends call me Meg, or at least they would if I had any friends. So… did they give you a name along with all those rippling pectorials?
Hercules: Uh, I’m, uh, um-
Megara: Are you always this articulate?
Hercules: Hercules. My… My name is Hercules.
Megara: Hercules, huh? I think I prefer Wonderboy.
Hercules: So, uh, how-how-how’d you get mixed up with the, uh-
Megara: Pinhead with hooves? [Hercules nods] Well, you know how men are. They think “no” means “yes” and “get lost” means “take me, I’m yours”. Don’t worry, Shorty here can explain it to ya later. Well, thanks for everything, Herc. It’s been a real slice. [She starts to walk away.]
Hercules: Wait! [She stops and turns.] Um… can we give you a ride? [Pegasus snorts, whinnies and flies to a high branch.]
Megara: Uh… I don’t think your pinto likes me very much.
Hercules: Pegasus? Oh, no, don’t be silly! He’d be more than happy to- Ow. [PEGASUS has dropped an apple on Hercules’ head. He looks up and Pegasus whistles innocently.]
Megara: I’ll be alright. I’m a big, tough girl. I can tie my own sandals and everything. [She walks away again.] Bye-bye, Wonderboy.

Megara: Please! Help! Please! There’s been a terrible accident!
Hercules: Meg?
Phil: Speakin’ of disasters.
Megara: Wonderboy! Hercules, thank goodness!
Hercules: Wha-what’s wrong?
Megara: Outside of town, two little boys, they were playing in the gorge. There was this rock slide, a terrible rock slide! They’re
Hercules: Kids? Trapped? Phil! Phil, this is great!
Megara: You’re really choked up about this, aren’t ya?

Megara: Looks like your game is over- Wonderboy’s hitting every curve you throw at him.
Hades: Oh, yeah… I wonder if maybe I haven’t been throwing the right curves at him, Meg, my sweet.
Megara: Don’t even go there.
Hades: See, he’s gotta have a weakness, because everybody’s got a weakness, I mean for Pandora, it was the box thing, for the
Trojans, hey, they bet on the wrong horse, okay? We simply need to find out Wonderboy’s.
Megara: I’ve done my part. Get your little imps-
Hades: They couldn’t handle him as a baby. I need someone who can … handle him as a man.
Megara: Hey, I’ve sworn off man-handling.
Hades: Well, you know, that’s good, because that’s what got you into this jam in the first place, isn’t it? You sold your soul to me to
save your boyfriend’s life. And how does this creep thank you? By running off with some babe. He hurt you real bad, didn’t he, Meg? Huh?
Megara: Look, I learned my lesson, okay?
Hades: Which is exactly why I got a feelin’ you’re gonna leap at my new offer. You give me the key to bringing down Wonderbreath and I give you the thing that you crave most in the entire cosmos! Your freedom.

Megara: Let’s see … what could be behind curtain number one? [She pulls the cord on the side and we see Hercules behind the curtain.]
Hercules: Meg!
Megara: It’s alright. The sea of raging hormones has ebbed.
Hercules: Gee, i-i-it’s great to see you. I-I-I missed you.
Megara: [Flopping down onto a couch] So this is what heroes do on their days off?
Hercules: Ah… I’m no hero…
Megara: Sure ya are. Everybody in Greece thinks you’re the greatest thing since they put the pocket in pita.
Hercules: I know, it’s-it’s crazy, y’know, I can’t go anywhere
without being mobbed, I mean-
Megara: Ah. You sound like you could use a day off. Think your nanny goat would go berserk if you played hooky this afternoon?
Hercules: Oh, gee. I-I don’t know. Phil’s got the rest of the day pretty much booked-
Megara: Ah, Phil-schmill. Just follow me- out the window, round the dumbbells, you lift up the back wall and we’re gone.

Hercules: I didn’t know playing hooky could be so much fun.
Megara: Yeah. Neither did I.
Hercules: Thanks, Meg.
Megara: Oh… don’t thank me just yet. Oh! [She falls into HERCULES’ arms.]
Hercules: Oops- careful.
Megara: Sorry. Weak ankles.
Hercules: Oh yeah? Well maybe you’d better sit down. [He carries her over to a bench, puts her down, then sits down beside her.]
Megara: So… uh… do you have any problems with things like this? [She stretches out her leg and holds her foot right in front of his face.]
Hercules: Uh…
Megara: Weak ankles, I mean.
Hercules: Oh. Uh, no. Not really.
Megara: [Moving closer to him] No weaknesses whatsoever? No trick knee?
Hercules: Uh…
Megara: Ruptured… disks?
Hercules: No. I’m… I’m afraid I’m uh… fit as a fiddle. [He stands.]
Megara: [sighs] Wonderboy, you are perfect.
Hercules: Thanks.

Megara: If there’s a prize for rotten judgement,
I guess I’ve already won that
No man is worth the aggravation
That’s ancient history, been there, done that

Megara: No chance no way I won’t say it, no no
It’s too cliche I won’t say I’m in love

Megara: I thought my heart had learned its lesson
It feels so good when you start out
My head is screaming “Get a grip girl
Unless you’re dying to cry your heart out

Megara: No chance no way I won’t say it, no no
This scene won’t play I won’t say I’m in love
You’re way off base I won’t say it
At least out loud I won’t say I’m in love

Hades: I’m sorry… you hear that sound? That’s the sound on your freedom fluttering out the window… forever.
Megara: I don’t care. I’m not gonna help you hurt him.
Hades: I can’t believe you’re getting so worked up about some… guy.
Megara: This one is different. He’s honest, and – and he’s sweet-
Hades: Please.
Megara: He would never do anything to hurt me.
Hades: He’s a guy!
Megara: Besides, oh Oneness, you can’t beat him. He has no weaknesses. He’s gonna —
Hades: I think he does, Meg. I truly think… he does.

Megara: Hercules! Look out! [She pushes him out of the way, but the pillar falls on her instead.]
Hercules: Meg! NO! What’s happening?
Megara: H-Hades’ deal is broken. He promised I wouldn’t get hurt.
Hercules: Meg. Why- why did you… you didn’t have to-
Megara: Oh, people always do crazy things… when they’re in love.
Hercules: Oh… Meg. Meg, I- I…
Megara: Are you… always this articulate? You- you haven’t got much time. You can still stop Hades.

Kirsten Cohen (The O.C.): ISTJ

Dominant Introverted Sensing [Si]: Kirsten’s past and her upbringing have a profound impact on her. She has conservative beliefs because her parents had conservative beliefs. She goes into the same line of work as her father, and is one of the most hardworking people at The Newport Group. Kirsten is reliable and committed to her work. She has a keen understanding of how society works and how to act within it. It takes Kirsten longer to warm up to new things and people than the rest of her family. She is leery about allowing Ryan into her home and believes that he is trouble. Unlike Sandy, she can’t just open her home and heart up to a stranger. He could be dangerous. However, the more time she spends with Ryan, the more she is able to see that he is a decent kid, and she ends up wanting to help him. It just takes her a little bit longer than Sandy and Seth, who are instantly accepting of Ryan. Kirsten enjoys traditions and holidays (especially Valentine’s Day, much to Sandy’s dismay). She spends New Year’s Eve doing the same thing every year. When she thinks that Sandy forgot their 20th wedding anniversary, she’s furious with him. Kirsten is comfortable with her routine and doesn’t seek much spontaneity in life. She values her family, makes sure her home is taken care of, and doesn’t really know how to take a vacation. Kirsten often clashes with her younger sister, Hailey, because Hailey enjoys living her life in the moment – she’s rootless and backpacks her way around the world. Hailey’s dominant Se is very difficult for Kirsten’s dominant Si to deal with. When Kirsten finds out about Hailey’s relationship with Jimmy, she insists that this is “what Hailey does.” When they were younger, she would use people to get back at her, so Kirsten believes that’s what her affair with Jimmy is. It couldn’t possibly be real. Kirsten trusts Charlotte and heeds her advice because Charlotte posed as someone who had been through similar experiences. If Charlotte relapsed after leaving rehab too soon, the same might happen to me…”

Auxiliary Extroverted Thinking [Te]: While Sandy is the laid-back “friend” parent, Kirsten picks up the slack by being strict and enforcing rules. She’s much more authoritative than Sandy is, which sometimes forces her to be the “bad guy.” Kirsten wants to be productive and rarely spends time doing anything if it doesn’t yield a tangible result. She enjoys working and even does it to “relax.” Kirsten likes to be in control, so it drives her crazy when Sandy’s mother comes to visit because she’s taking over their house. It’s natural for Kirsten to be able to focus on the task at hand, and she doesn’t like to be distracted when she’s trying to get work done or fix a problem. Kirsten is very hands-on and always likes to have a project. She organizes many charity events and galas in Newport. She’s good at delegating work and staying on target to make sure everything gets done properly. Kirsten tries to keep other people to concentrate on work, which proves to be difficult when she goes into business with Julie. Kirsten just wants to devote herself to the business and commit fully – which she finds difficult when she gets the impression that Julie isn’t interested in getting work done. Even though Kirsten put in a lot of work for what she thought was going to be a big event (which turned out to just be a private date for her “client” to attempt to woo Julie), it doesn’t really bother her, because they got paid for their work, which made it a success in Kirsten’s eyes.

Tertiary Introverted Feeling [Fi]: Sometimes, Kirsten can internalize her feelings. Instead of being forthcoming with them, she acts out (which leads her to develop a drinking problem). Kirsten prioritizes her family and her own loved ones over others. Sandy wants to do what he feels is right (taking Ryan in and giving him a shot at a decent life), but Kirsten is unwilling to allow him to stay under the same roof as her son, because he might get him into trouble. Kirsten doesn’t want the people she loves to put themselves on the line on her account. She’s independent and wants to clean up her own messes and protect those she cares about -which is why she didn’t want Sandy to get involved with her legal woes with the Newport Group. Sometimes, Kirsten is able to put aside what’s “logical.” When Theresa is considering an abortion, Kirsten tells her that she “doesn’t have to make the decision that makes the most sense.” When Sandy asks Kirsten whether she has any idea what Ryan’s going through right now, Kirsten tells him she has a much better idea of what Theresa is going through. It’s easier for her to relate to others when she experienced something similar (Si-Fi). She’s able to relate to Lindsey about Caleb because he’s let Kirsten down so many times throughout the years that she’s able to offer her comfort because she knows what that feels like. If something is important to Kirsten, she devotes a lot of time and energy to it.

Inferior Extroverted Intuition [Ne]: While Kirsten isn’t usually the creative type, she is capable of coming up with ideas of her own. However, her ideas typically stem from something in her external world that gives her a light bulb. For instance, when she sees what a man was willing to pay just to go on a date with Julie, she decides it would be a good idea to ditch their original plan and start their own high end dating service instead. After spending years working for the Newport Group, she is finally able to walk away and wash her hands of it. Although Kirsten typically clings to convention, she is able to take risks and make bold choices. Eventually, Kirsten is even willing to abandon everything she knows to start fresh with Sandy and their new baby. Later, she even decides to leave her home, her life, and everyone she knows in Newport and relocated. Granted, this is also a step backwards, as she moves forward by returning to the home she had in Berkeley with Sandy. It’s hard for Kirsten to adjust to new ideas and new ways of doing things, and it has to happen in her own time and on her own terms. But once she does make the choice to change something in her life, she can really embrace the unknown.

Enneagram: 6w5 1w2 3w2 Sp/Sx


Seth: Hey. What are you doing, working from home?
Kirsten: I’m on vacation.
Seth: [surveying the paperwork] Yes. Clearly.
Kirsten: I find reviewing end-of-the-year accounts to be very relaxing.
Seth: Okay. I hope that’s a recessive gene.
Kirsten: You should be so lucky. Look, I haven’t taken a vacation in a while and I’m easing into it.
Seth: Hey, I don’t judge okay? I only mock.
Kirsten: That you get from your father.
Seth checking his eyebrows: Oh my god, they’re coming in? Oh that’s… I gotcha…

Kirsten: Hailey can we focus for a moment?
Hailey: On the fact that someone’s gotten matronly in the last two years?
Kirsten: Two years is the part that I want to focus on.
Hailey: What am I going to wear tonight? A little Ann Taylor, little Ralph Lauren… Oh my god. Is this from Talbots?
Kirsten: It was a gift. Haven’t you been living in hostels, out of a backpack, wearing clothes made from hemp?
Hailey: That was last year, Kiki.
Kirsten: Don’t call me Kiki! Only Dad calls me Kiki. And only because he won’t… not.

Kirsten: I just don’t understand. I’ve worked so hard for him. I’ve killed myself for him.
Sandy: The man is a bottomless pit of need. You think you can fill it? You can’t. You’re amazing. If he can’t appreciate you, screw him. Quit.

Hailey: So tonight, you guys—
Kirsten: Are going to dinner at The Arches. We do it every year. Home in time to watch Dick Clark and the ball drop. Two images that should not be used in the same sentence.

Kirsten: You spend so much time having fun. You’re whole life is dedicated to having fun. Are you even having any?

Kirsten: Julie I really appreciate your desire to be such good friends. But the thing about good friends is that when they want something, they just ask.

Kirsten: This is my mistake, not yours. And I will not let you compromise yourself. Not even for me.

Kirsten: I told you that I didn’t want you to get involved.
Sandy: I will always do what’s best for my family.
Kirsten: I would rather go to jail than be responsible for you being mixed up in this— getting into bed with my father.
Sandy: I promise you, I’d rather send you to jail that get in bed with your father.

Kirsten: What am I supposed to do? Sit back and let your mother take over the entire house?
Sandy: She’s going to do it anyway. At least this way we get a decent meal out of it.

Kirsten: This is what Hailey does. She uses people to get back at me.
Jimmy: Kirsten, this isn’t about you.

Kirsten: Julie, we are smart, sophisticated women. We don’t need strange naked men dancing in front of us to be entertained.
Julie: I’m not as smart as you. Plus, the boys are getting strippers.

Theresa: Not having this baby makes the most sense.
Kirsten: You don’t have to make the decision that makes the most sense.

Kirsten: Denial is a very effective coping mechanism.

Sandy: Do you know what Ryan’s going through right now?!
Kirsten: Not as well as I know what she’s going through.

Julie: Look who has a new ficus!
Kirsten: Ah, I have a ton of work to do.
Julie: I figure now that I’m in charge I could infuse a little more life into this place. You know, ficus here, and orchid there. Next thing you know we are a—
Kirsten: A rain forest. Thanks for the plant, but right now this company is one failed deal away from total ruin. Which means I have to ficus. I mean focus.
Julie: Ficus, focus. You are all over the place.

Kirsten: I thought you and Jimmy were getting along really well.
Julie: Oh really. What makes you say that?
Kirsten: Because last week you said you and Jimmy were getting along really well.

Sandy: Woah! Top of the morning to you too.
Kirsten: Happy Anniversary.
Sandy: [after an akward pause] Happy Anniversary to you as well.
Kirsten: I love you.
Sandy: I love you too. Oh, I love you more now than I did nineteen years ago.
Kirsten: You mean you love me more now than you did a year after we got married?
Sandy: No! Come on. No, you know what I’m saying. That Newlywed year, that doesn’t count. It’s a given.
Kirsten: You don’t know how long we’ve been married.
Sandy: No! No. I was kidding you. I know it’s our twentieth. How could I forget that? Who forgets their twentieth anniversary?
Kirsten: Apparently you.

Kirsten: I’m not letting the boys stay with Julie Cooper, but they can’t be left alone.
Sandy: Honey. Teenagers. They like girls.
Kirsten: One of which happens to be my sister.
Sandy: So what, we’re gonn forbid him?
Kirsten: Not you. You wouldn’t forbid them anything. You’re too busy being their best friend. I’m the one that has to enforce all the rules.
Sandy: I’ve never done more grounding than I have in the last twenty-four hours!
Kirsten: Who let Seth run away to Portland?
Sandy: What, we’re talking about this now?
Kirsten: You went up there and told him he could stay.
Sandy: It’s a good thing I did! If I let you drag him home we could have lost him forever.
Kirsten: But that’s why this is happening! Because he thinks he can do whatever he wants and you’ll just keep me from coming down on him.
Sandy: You think somebody can stop you from coming down on somebody?
Kirsten: Right. And I should find it adorable that you forgot our anniversary!

Caleb: My god, did you give any thought to your kids?
Kirsten: I am a good mother.
Caleb: You are also an alcoholic. Your mother was one, too. She did her best to hide it, but I always knew.
Kirsten: Why do you think mom drank the way she did?! Why do you think Hailey left the house at 17? If this family is screwed up it’s because of you!
Caleb: I gave you everything you ever wanted.
Kirsten: I may like my Chardonnay but I am not gonna die alone and that’s more than I can say for you!

Kirsten: Who wants to see their maids nude?
Julie: Not maids, Kirsten. They’re strippers.
Kirsten: Who wants a stripper doing their laundry?

Julie: You know what I’m really craving? Sweet corn ravioli. Or do you think that will be too heavy with the crab cakes?
Kirsten: What I think is that you don’t find this business very interesting.
Julie: I’m sorry, Kiki. I’ve just been eating a lot of Ramen lately.
Kirsten: Julie, if this business works, you’ll never have to boil your dinner again.

Kirsten: How was your date?
Julie: Oh, it was awful. We totally didn’t click, we had nothing to talk about, his tongue was like sandpaper.
Kirsten: I’m sorry to hear that.
Julie: I’m sorry, I never should have stayed. It was so unprofessional of me. You made all that food for nothing.
Kirsten: Well, it wasn’t for nothing. We got paid. In a way, our first venture was a success.
Julie: Yeah, I guess so. How weird is it that a guy would spend that much money just to have dinner with a woman.
Kirsten: Julie, I have an idea for a new business.
Julie: Oh my god! A high class call girl operation. I love it!
Kirsten: No. A high end dating service.
Julie: Oh! That could work too.

Kirsten: Julie, last week at dinner I had a drink.
Julie: What? Oh my god.
Kirsten: Now it was the first in eleven months, it was only one glass, and I’ve been going to AA meetings every day. But it happened.
Julie: Have you talked to Sandy about this?
Kirsten: No. I tried before. I could feel it coming.
Julie: Kirsten, you have to tell him.
Kirsten: That the stress of our marriage has triggered my drinking?
Julie: Yes. That’s exactly what you say.
Kirsten: I am not going to use my alcoholism to save our marriage. If he can’t value it for what it is, then what is the point?
Julie: Then what are you going to do?
Kirsten: I don’t know.

Kirsten: Are we crazy coming here?
Sandy: Driving all night to a foreign country where neither of us speak the language and we only have a vague notion of where they are? Yeah. It’s a little crazy.
Kirsten: How much longer do we keep doing this—rescuing them every time they’re in trouble?
Sandy: I don’t know. But for now, I think that’s our job.

Julie: Kirsten, I’m sorry. It was the only way I could think to get you to spend the day with me.
Kirsten: So you told all those women they have chlamydia when they don’t?
Julie: They might. They did have sex with male hookers. Plus I picked the five meanest women in Newport.
Kirsten: What is wrong with you?
Julie: I was desperate. I missed you. I hate not having you in my life, Kirsten. I can live without you as my business partner, but not without you as my friend.
Kirsten: You are going to call all those woman tomorrow and you are going to tell them the truth.
Julie: Okay. But not Linda. Please let Linda think she has an STD.
Kirsten: That is not only unethical, it is just plain mean.
Julie: I disagree. Do you want to debate about it over dinner? You know you missed me, c’mon. Say it. Kirsten.

Kirsten: If we’re going to talk about girls, I am a far more knowledgeable resource than my son.

Venus “Vee” Delmonico (Nerve): ISFJ

Dominant Introverted Sensing [Si]: It’s hard for Venus to be spontaneous and take risks. She is practical, responsible, and doesn’t like to be forced out of her comfort zone. Venus prefers to be on the sidelines and watch others live. She’s fine with predictability. She’s always been more of a spectator than an active participant, which Sydney chastises her for. When Venus hears that someone in Seattle supposedly died playing Nerve, she doesn’t believe it because it would’ve been shut down if that were true. Venus prefers to feel comfortable and she tries to back out of the game several times when the stakes continue to be raised. When Venus realizes how dangerous the game is becoming, her response is to go to the police. If something is getting people hurt, you go to the police with it. That’s just what you do. However, this approach lands her in a lot of trouble for “snitching.”

Auxiliary Extroverted Feeling [Fe]: Even though she’s uncomfortable playing the game, she keeps allowing Ian to convince her to keep playing. Venus is wiling to miss out on a typical college experience, which she really wants to live at home and commute to a local school in order to be with her mother, who doesn’t want her going away following the death of her eldest child. She can’t even bring herself to tell her mom about her acceptance to CalArts. She goes along with what other people want, but never does anything for herself. Venus doesn’t really stand up for herself when Sydney admonishes her for the way she lives her life, and seems to avoid confrontation. Venus cares about what other people think of her and is humiliated when Sydney tries to talk to JP on her behalf. Venus is very upfront with her feelings and doesn’t try to mask them. She initially doesn’t open up about her feelings regarding Sydney when Ian asks because she thinks he doesn’t want to hear about it. She doesn’t want to burden him or bore him with her drama. However, when he encourages her to open up, she is able to freely express all of her feelings with ease. If Venus isn’t okay, she has no problem saying so.

Tertiary Introverted Thinking [Ti]: It’s clear that Venus is capable of coming up with innovative solutions to problems. When the game tells her and Ian to leave the store after they try on expensive outfits, she notes that technically the game just told them to leave… they don’t actually need to be wearing them at the time they leave the store. It’s her ability to look beyond the facts (everyone on the game is there anonymously) that ends up allowing her to shut down the game. Venus is also good at analysis, which is evident when she tries to explain what To the Lighthouse is really about to Ian. When pushed, Venus can make brutal assessments about people (“…you’re one of those girls who peaks in high school. And when you wake up one day, still living in Staten island, still screwing the same guys, wondering what the hell happened to your life.”).

Inferior Extroverted Intuition [Ne]: Trying new things is extremely difficult for Venus. Between her best friend berates her for never seizing the moment or seeking adventure, and that same friend publicly embarrassing her moments later, Venus decides to take a leap and give in to the unknown.
Tommy points out that what she’s doing isn’t her, but for Venus, that’s the whole point! She struggles to put herself in dangerous situations, but eventually it starts to give her a rush. Venus is able to think creatively. She wants to find a way to be able to go to CalArts, so she casually suggests that her mom list their home on Airbnb When Sydney and Tommy try to convince her that there’s no way to stop the game because everyone on it is anonymous, she thinks “What if they weren’t anonymous?”

Enneagram: 6w7 2w1 9w1 Sp/Sx


Venus: I mean, Syd hasn’t gotten into any schools yet. And she doesn’t even care.
Nancy: You know what? Sydney doesn’t have to care. She has a trust fund. And you have something far more valuable than that.
Venus: Here we go.
Nancy: You have drive, you have focus. You have a scholarship to a local college. And even though we can’t afford the dorm, you get to have me as your new college roommate.
Venus: Actually, I, um… I had kind of a cool idea about that. What if we fixed up Mike’s room and listed you on Airbnb or something? Maybe it’s time we finally go through his stuff and maybe give some of it to goodwill. And I could give you some space.
Nancy: I don’t want space. I just want you.
Venus: Okay. I’m totally down with commuting. I can… I can get my reading done on the ferry.
Nancy: Yeah? That’ll work, right?
Venus: Yeah.

Venus: You just got suspended. I thought you were done playing nerve.
Sydney: Hell no! The girl who won Seattle now has millions of followers. She’s insta-famous.
Venus: Who cares?
Sydney: I care, Vee. I don’t expect you to understand. I’m an adrenaline junkie. You like to stay within your comfort zone. That’s fine.
Venus: That’s not true. What about that pole dancing class we took?
Sydney: Vee, I dragged you there and you sat in the corner and watched.
Venus: I’m a visual learner.
Tommy: Why are you attacking her?
Sydney: I’m not attacking her, Tommy.
Tommy: Yeah, you are.
Venus: Life is passing you by. You need to learn to take a few risks every once in a while.
Venus: I do take risks.

Sydney: I love you so much, Vee. But you’re a watcher. So watch me do it for you.

Tommy: You signed up as a player? Oh, man.
Venus: What? Is that so hard to believe?
Tommy: You know that some kid supposedly died in Seattle playing Nerve?
Venus: Oh, I don’t buy that. If kids were dying, the game would be shut down.
Tommy: No, they can’t shut it down. There’s not a single server.
What does that mean?
Tommy: Everybody that logs onto the game becomes a new server. So it’s impossible to turn the game off.
Venus: How do you even know so much about this game? You’ve never even played.
Tommy: Look, I spend a lot of time on the dark web, all right?
Venus: Oh, a lot of time on the dark web? Is that right, hacker boy?
Tommy: Yes, that is right. You’re only accessing 10% of the Internet, you know. Why are you even doing this? Seriously, it’s dangerous. Is it because of Sydney?
Venus: This is not about Sydney. I’m…
Tommy: It’s just not like you.
Venus: That’s the point.

Venus: To the Lighthouse, that’s my favorite book.
Ian/Sam: Really? Please, tell me they get to the lighthouse in the end. Um… Actually, don’t tell me. Uh… okay, just tell me real quick.
Venus: Yeah, they do, but that’s… That’s not really what it’s about. The lighthouse means something different to each of the characters. It basically represents the thing they want most in life. And I’m sorry that I’m totally geeking out and ruining the story.
Ian/Sam: No, I was the one who asked.

Ian/Sam: I was hoping you’d come.
Venus: I’m just warning you, I don’t think I’d make a very good partner. I’m not the daredevil type. You should team up with my friend Sydney, actually. She’s obsessed with playing Nerve.
Ian/Sam: But the watchers want me to team up with you.
Venus: The second I feel uncomfortable, I’m out.
Ian/Sam: That’s fair.
Venus: Okay.

Ian/Sam: Come on, we have to make a run for it. Come on, let’s go.
Venus: I am not shoplifting!
Ian/Sam: We don’t have a choice. Come on!
Venus: Okay, technically, it just says we have to leave the store. Right?

Venus: What did that just say? Blindfolded? On the motorcycle?
Venus: You’re on your own with that one.
Ian/Sam:Wait, wait. I can’t do this alone. Come on, I need you to help me navigate.
Venus: There is no way in hell I’m doing that. I’m sorry, I’m out. Thank you for tonight. I mean… I had a lot of fun. Got a new dress. But I… I’m good.
Ian/Sam: Stay. Let’s see what else happens.

Ian/Sam: You gonna get it?
Venus: I don’t wanna deal with her right now.
Ian/Sam: What’s goin’ on?
Venus: She’s just been a lot recently. But whatever, you don’t wanna talk about that.
Ian/Sam: If you wanna talk about it, I’m here. Happy to listen.
Venus: I’m just tired of being her sidekick all the time.
Ian/Sam: It’s funny. You don’t seem like anyone’s sidekick. Can I see that picture again?
Venus: Oh, uh… Sure.
Ian/Sam: Wow.
Venus: Yeah. Guys go crazy for her.
Ian/Sam: No, I mean the picture itself. It’s really good.
Venus: Thanks, I took it.
Ian/Sam: Yeah? You have a good eye. I just… I can’t picture you hangin’ out with someone like this.
Venus: What do you mean?
Ian/Sam: I don’t know. She looks kind of… Insecure. Is that mean?
Venus: She is totally insecure.
Ian/Sam: Yeah?
Venus: She makes it seem like I’m the one who’s insecure. But really it’s her. It’s exhausting.
Ian/Sam: I’m sure.
Venus: She’s at this party. Most likely drunk and needs me to hold her hair back. I’m just over it. I mean, so are her parents. They’re constantly out of town, so she has this revolving door of guys over. It’s sad, actually.

Venus: Syd? [Venus walks in on Sydney in bed with the guy she likes]
Sydney: Oh, come on, Vee, you never even spoke to him.
Venus: It’s fine. Certainly no surprise.
Sydney: Yeah, I know it’s not a surprise. You know what’s not fine, though? I almost died tonight, Vee, and you were nowhere to be found.
Venus: I’m sorry. When you said I should live my life, did you mean I should live my life in your shadow?
Sydney: I was just trying to help you, Vee, because you’re the most repressed person that I know.
Venus: Well, isn’t that why you keep me around? Because I never tell you the truth?
Sydney: Yeah.
Venus: Come on, let’s go.
Sydney: I guess you don’t tell me the truth. Because you never told me about how insecure I am. Or about how I just have a revolving door of guys all the time. You never tell me that, but you’ve told everyone that tonight. So please, Vee, go right ahead and show us all what a fiery little spark plug you’ve become since lunch.
Venus: Let’s go.
Sydney: Don’t walk away from me. Vee! Wake up! This is a game.
Do you really think that someone like him is actually gonna be with you when this is all done?
Ian/Sam: Hey, you don’t know me.
Sydney: Oh, I’m sorry. You really like her now?
Ian/Sam: Yeah, I do.
Tommy: All right, come on, Syd, you’re just drunk.
Sydney: Tommy, it is time to get over her! Clearly, she has traded up!
Venus: Why do you have to be such a bitch?
Sydney: Look at that! Little Vee finally speaking her mind. Come on! Unburden yourself!
Venus: Do you know why we’re best friends? I do whatever you want all the time.
Sydney: No, Vee, we’re friends because I’m fun and you’re boring.
The only fun thing about you was your brother. What is it you think? That playing Nerve is just gonna magically make you a different person? That’s not how life works. You’ll never be a player.
Venus: You’re right. I know how much you love living in the moment, Syd. Well, remember this moment. Because you’re one of those girls who peaks in high school. And when you wake up one day, still living in Staten island, still screwing the same guys,
wondering what the hell happened to your life. If you wanna know
where I am from now on, sign up and watch me.
Ian/Sam: Wait, Vee, what are you doing? Hey, Vee, you don’t need to do this. Look at me. Come on. Let’s just go, let’s bail, all right? What do you have to prove? Come on, please. Let’s go. Come on, you got it, Vee, please!

Venus: Officer, I need help. I’m… I’m playing this game. It’s called Nerve. And I’m worried that someone’s gonna get really hurt.

Ian/Sam: Are you okay?
Venus: Am I okay? No, I’m not okay! You need to tell me everything. Okay, what the hell is going on?

Sydney: There’s no one to stop. It’s just a bunch of anonymous people.
Venus: What if they weren’t anonymous?

Venus: Tommy, you said the game is open source, right? Do you think you can change the code?
Tommy: It’s gonna take time.
Venus: Syd, could you buy us some?

Nathan Wuornos (Haven): ISTJ

Dominant Introverted Sensing [Si]: The past has a huge impact on Nathan. He’s unable to let it go and tends to hold onto grudges. Even though Duke regularly goes above and beyond to help the police, he still seems him as the kid who used to bully him. When Duke and another boy stuck tacks in Nathan’s back as a kid and then manipulated him into going to talk to a girl who “liked” Nathan. Because of this incident, Nathan was unable to speak to another girl for two years. Duke’s father killed troubled people, so obviously Duke will follow in his footsteps. He’s dangerous and he must be stopped. Past hurts stay with Nathan for a very long time and his experiences shape who he is. He’s unable to fix his relationship with his father because things have been sour between them for so long that he doesn’t know how to start fresh with him. Nathan is comfortable with routine and doesn’t actively seek change in his life. He drives the same truck he’s had since he was was 19. Nathan is traditional and tends to follow procedure. He typically favors the practical, straightforward approach and usually leaves the out-of-the-box thinking to Audrey.

Auxiliary Extroverted Thinking [Te]: Nathan is comfortable with taking action and getting things done. He thinks pragmatically and lives in a world of facts. Even though the Troubles propel him into a world of uncertainty, he tries to cling to established truths and denies that his affliction is due to the Troubles, convincing himself he suffers from a medical condition instead. When he finds out that Duke is supposed to die at the hands of someone with the Guard tattoo, Nathan goes out and gets it himself because he believes he needs to be able to take him out if Duke gives into his family’s curse. As soon as Audrey emerges from the Barn, he immediately tries to get her to kill him in order to end the Troubles once and for all. Nathan prefers concrete, physical evidence in his investigations. He just wants to get the job done, and doesn’t usually care about the hows or the whys. He just wants to solve his cases, not necessarily understand them.

Tertiary Introverted Feeling [Fi]: Emotions are difficult for Nathan to deal with. His feelings are very intense, but he tends to bottle them up prefers to do something about them rather than discuss them. He holds onto his resentment for his father instead of trying to communicate and move on (Si-Fi). He also chooses to keep it to himself for quite some time when he realizes that he can feel Audrey’s touch. Nathan is unable to let Audrey go, which causes him to shoot Agent Howard instead of allowing her to end the Troubles, dooming the entire town because of his inability to say goodbye to her. When she comes back as Lexi, he’s cold and distant with her because she’s not Audrey. When Nathan realizes how badly he screwed up by ruining Haven’s chances of ending the troubles, he is willing to sacrifice his life in order to end them by trying to force Audrey to kill him.

Inferior Extroverted Intuition [Ne]: Seeing possibilities isn’t Nathan’s strong suit. He’s more focused on the facts than what could be, though the more he investigates the Troubles, the more open he becomes to speculating about the unknown. He isn’t fascinated with it the way that Audrey is. He just wants to do his job and protect the town. Nathan needs clear, indisputable evidence before believing something and his ways of approaching situations tend to be more practical than creative. He prefers to write his trouble off as a medical condition rather than call it what it really is. He tries to “help” Daniel by rescuing him from what he perceives as him being drowned by Cole, but Audrey is the one who is able to see that he needs to be in the water. Every now and then, he can become intrigued with the unknown. He’s attracted to Jess because she’s “interesting” and a lot different than he is. She believes that the Troubles are magic and tries to get Nathan to embrace who he is.

Note: Nathan spends a lot of time in a Si-Fi loop.

Enneagram: 6w5 1w2 2w1 Sx/So


Duke: It’s the truth. Trust me.
Nathan: Do you remember third grade?
Duke: I remember that you really liked the Pet Shop Boys.
Nathan: Spring. You waited inside for me with a bunch of your friends after gym class. You’re all smiling, congratulating me.
Duke: Do we have to do this right now?
Nathan: Yep.
Duke: Okay. Okay. I – I – I told you that Carla Rose had a crush on you.
Nathan: I felt like I won the lottery.
Duke: Nathan, that was 25 years ago.
Nathan: You all slapped me on the back. Remember that? “Go talk to her. Talk to her.” So I walk down the hall and I got up to her and I felt like my heart was beating out of my chest. I finally open my mouth enough to actually tell her that I liked her too.
Duke: She screamed.
Nathan: Screamed because there was blood dripping down my back. From?
Duke: The tacks that we stuck in it.
Nathan: When you were “congratulating” me. You had a pool going on how many you guys could stick in my back before I noticed.
Duke: Sixteen.
Nathan: Sixteen. Hmm.
Duke: Nathan, if it wasn’t for me, you never would have even talked to her.
Nathan: I didn’t talk to another girl for two years after that.
Duke: I was eight years old!
Nathan: Uh, so was I.
Duke: And so what?
Nathan: So what?
Duke: You think I should die for that?
Nathan: Well…

Audrey: Miss Minion, why do people think that you’re a witch?
Jess: Maybe because they don’t like the way I think.
Audrey: So you’re not a witch?
Jess: What’s a witch? Someone who does magic? What do you think the Troubles are? Magic is everywhere here. It’s in the soil, the water, in us. You suffer so much because you can’t understand what’s happened to you. You know it’s not a medical condition, but you still don’t wanna face the real truth. That you’re transformed by magic. You’re not less, Nathan. You’re more. The only thing wrong with you is your perspective.

Nathan: I came to say I’m sorry.
Jess: You’re sorry?
Nathan: What you said was true. I don’t know… I don’t know about magic, but… I’m definitely something… different…. Or I could be.
Jess: I kind of like you the way you are.

Audrey: I like the truck.
Nathan: I’ve had it since I was 19.
Audrey: How do you keep a car that long?
Nathan: I don’t drive off cliffs…

Audrey: Vince said that if I go into The Barn with my father, I could activate the Aether in to stop the void, end the 27 year cycle. All the troubled would live and the troubles would be gone forever. It would be finally over, Nathan.
Nathan: Really? I was kinda just getting used to it…
Audrey: …I have to go.
Nathan: You do.
Audrey: And I won’t be coming back this time.
Nathan: I know.
Audrey: I’m so sorry.
Nathan: [he pulls her into a hug] What do you have to be sorry for?
Audrey: Leaving you. I wanted us to have more time.
Nathan: We’ll always want more time. The trick will be being thankful for the time we had. We had an amazing time.
Audrey: Yeah, we did.
Nathan: And I spent so much of it trying to keep you here, but now I realize the reason I love you is because you’re willing to go. You are an amazing person, Audrey Parker. I never felt anything until I met you. You saved me. You made me real. I love you, Audrey. I will always love you.
Audrey: Nathan, promise me something.
Nathan: Anything.
Audrey: I want you to be okay. I don’t want you to be alone, so promise me that you will find someone, you will find someone that will make you happy, and you will move on.
Nathan: Move on? How could I ever do that? I will think about you every minute, of every hour, of every day, and that’s why I’ll be okay. After everything you’ve done for the people of this town, for me, Parker, You’ll be with me in all the people who’s pain you’ve taken away. With me in all the people in this town who are free to live, and love, and grow, without fear. When the sun finally shines down on Haven again, you’ll be with me in all the families we’ve put back together, and the ones out in the world who’ve suffered with troubles, too. You’ll be with me when Haven returns to the world and becomes the town we both know it can be. Every person that we have hope, faith that something good could happen for all of us. You’ll be with me in every person who’s happy now, at peace. Because you, Audrey, I’ll never forget you. You will always be with me, and no matter what happens, I will always love you…

Nathan: I can’t worry about what the town thinks anymore. I gotta do what’s right. Sometimes risks pay off.

Nathan: What makes you think I have something to say to you?
Garland: Because you’re my son and I pay attention.
Nathan: Okay. You knew.
Garland: I knew what?
Nathan: The troubles. You knew they were back. You knew I had this – this – whatever this is and you never said anything.
Garland: ‘Cause you weren’t ready to hear it. And when you got whatever it is, this thing that you got… What did you do? You went to see the doctor.
Nathan: I couldn’t feel anything. I thought I was sick! And he agreed with me. He even had a name for it.
Garland: You were hoping you were sick, but you knew better. Maybe you didn’t know when you were eight years old, but you sure as hell knew this time around. And what did you do? You chose to ignore something that was right in front of ya. And when a cop does that, what happens? He gets himself killed.
Nathan: Okay. Maybe I was in denial. So how ’bout calling me on it instead of ignoring me? How about a little fatherly advice?
Garland: You haven’t listened to anything I’ve had to say since you were a little kid.

Duke: What the hell is going on, man? You show up with that thing on your arm. What is that supposed to mean?
Nathan: If you’re supposed to die at the hands of somebody with this tattoo, I need to be on the approved list.
Duke: Nathan, I am not the enemy.
Nathan: Your father, your grandfather, his father before that, they all killed troubled people to wipe out their curses. You don’t think any of them had any doubts? You just think you’re special?
[A gun falls from the ceiling into Duke’s hand]
Duke: I’m gonna go with special. [Nathan starts to move towards him] Nathan… whoever took Audrey, they planted that whistle in her apartment so you would find it and come after me. They want us to kill each other. We are playing right into their hands. [Duke hands the gun to Nathan] I’m not my father.

Cole: Get away from the boy!
Nathan: What are you doing?
Cole: What needs to be done. Move! Both of you! Back under the water. Daniel…
Audrey: Stop right there!
Nathan: Get away from him, Cole. I’m not gonna tell you again.
Cole: You’re the ones hurting him!
Nathan: Daniel, come here. Let me help-
Daniel: Let me go!
Nathan: Let me help you. Daniel, stop! Stop! Let me help you!
Audrey: No! No, wait! Nathan, let him go.
Nathan: Huh? Why?
Audrey: I think that he needs to go back under the water. All right?
Please, just… Trust me.
Cole: It’s okay, Daniel. Lie down. Relax. It’ll be all right.

Audrey (as Lexi): You know I’m not her, right?
Nathan: Yeah, I do. You’re a completely different person, and I don’t want you. I want you to be Audrey again. I’m sorry. I know that’s a terrible thing to say. That’s just how I feel.

Jane Sloan (The Bold Type): ESFJ

Dominant Extroverted Feeling [Fe]: Jane cares about what other people think of her and how she is perceived by the public, which makes it hard for her to expose herself to the world. She wants to write her article about never having an orgasm anonymously because she’s afraid of being judged for it. She doesn’t want to look like an idiot in front of Jacqueline and works hard to please and impress her. Jacqueline even points out that Jane’s problem is that she pitches what she believe Jacqueline wants her to pitch instead of trying to find her own, unique voice. Jane wants to write her stories in terms of the general collective instead of tapping into her own, personal feelings. She can be very hard on herself and gets upset when Jacqueline seems disinterested in her ideas. Jane tries to encourage Kat to deal with her emotions by screaming at the top of her lungs in order to get out all of her feelings. Sometimes, Jane will keep her emotions to herself because she doesn’t want to bother other people with them, but when she wants to, she can very easily articulate her feelings. Jane is affirming and supportive. She knows how to make the people around her feel good about themselves and wants to uplift them and show they how awesome they are. Jane prefers when things are harmonious and will often opt to keep things to herself to avoid hurting anyone’s feelings or to avoid confrontation. Jane needs to feel supported to be able to accomplish difficult tasks. She has trouble writing her articles on orgasms and social media stalking, but is able to pull through and get the job done when the people around her give her the encouragement she needs.

Auxiliary Introverted Sensing [Si]: It’s important for Jane to make memories. She wants to savor the moment that she walks into Scarlet for the first time as a writer and takes pictures to document the occasion. It’s difficult for Jane to try new things and get out of her comfort zone. She tends to play it safe and resorts to pitches that have been done before. It’s not easy for her to come up with fresh, innovative ideas. Jane is more at ease writing political pieces than talking about sex and really has to push herself to be able to deliver what Jacqueline wants. Her friends often criticize her for being too uptight and try to get her to cut loose. Jane is an overachiever and goes above and beyond the call of duty. She follows the rules and wants to do exactly what is expected. Jane often seeks clarification and specific guidelines. It’s weird for her to go back to Eric’s apartment building because she can’t help but reminisce about all of the hours they spent sitting on the front steps together. She fell in love with Scarlet because it was reliable. She could always depend on it when she needed it. When Jane is trying to convince Kat to let go and just scream, she suggests doing it in the subway because when she was a kid, she hiked all the way up to the mountains to do it, and in New York City, screaming in front of a train is the next best thing if you don’t want to be heard.

Tertiary Extroverted Intuition [Ne]: Although Jane is typically reluctant to try new things, she will usually come around eventually. She is adamantly against trying using the yoni egg that the sexologist recommends, but ultimately decides to give it a try. It takes her a while to accept change and do something different, but when she’s encouraged by the people around her, she is capable of taking risks and being spontaneous. Jane is adept at brainstorming new ideas for articles and always has a selection of pitches to offer Jacqueline. When she pitches her plan to do a profile on Congresswoman Helen Wolfe, Jacqueline is surprised because it’s “quite a departure” for Jane, but that’s why Jane wants to tackle it. She wants to be open to writing different types of articles, but once she dives in, she can sometimes struggle because it’s unfamiliar territory. However, she usually finds her footing and is able to deliver quality work. She is initially unable to secure the interview with Helen Wolfe, but then tricks her people by pitching it as a fashion piece, and then attempts to get into meatier issues once her foot is in the door. Jane is also skilled when it comes to seeing connections and interpreting what’s really happening in a situation. For instance, she realizes that Helen Wolfe is using fashion as a smokescreen in order to get the public talking about her poor fashion sense instead of her questionable political decisions.

Inferior Introverted Thinking [Ti]: When Jane is trying to explain to her friends why she can’t allow herself to have sexual fantasies, she tells them that she applies too much logic
to the situations she imagines. If she has sex with a solder in a cotton field as Scarlett O’Hara, then that means she’s sleeping with a confederate soldier and is therefore on the wrong side of the Civil War. She often overthinks things and, under stress, can become too analytical. She sees the title of Ryan’s article and automatically assumes that it’s sexist and that he used her to write an article, leading her to angrily storm out instead of having a conversation with him about it. Jane is also good at coming up with titles for articles on the fly.

Enneagram: 6w7 2w3 1w2 So/Sx


Sutton: What are you doing?
Jane: Nothing. I just – I want to remember this moment.

Jane: I want to remember what walking into Scarlet Magazine as a writer feels like.

Jane: Lauren asked me to send ten pictures to the whole writing staff. I got so excited, I sent them twenty.
Kat: Nerd.

Sutton: Okay. Grab her.
Jane: We’re supposed to be at the August presentation meeting. What are you doing?
Kat: Calm down, Type A. We’re gonna get you there.

Alex: Go with your gut. What does Jane Sloane care about?
Jane: Uh, Jane Sloane cares about not looking like an idiot in front of Jacqueline again.
Jacqueline: Interesting. It just clicked for me what is going wrong with your ideas. You’re pitching what you think I want to hear.
Jane: Well-
Jacqueline: You’re a new voice. I want to hear it. You and me. My office. First thing tomorrow morning.
Jane: I think I am gonna to be sick.

Kat: What’s wrong with her?
Jane: Jacqueline hated all of my ideas.
Sutton: She didn’t hate them.
Jane: Oh, no. She was just fascinated by how boring they were.

Jane: God, it’s so weird being back here. I mean, how many hours did I spend hanging out on those steps with him? It’s okay, it’s okay. No need to be melodramatic. I’m fine.
Sutton: Jane, he’s the first guy that you said “I love you” to. It’s okay to not be fine.
Jane: But I’m seriously fine.

Jane: That’s why I fell in love with Scarlet. Cause when I needed it, it was like getting advice from an older sister that I always wished I had.

Jane: No, what you need to do right now is just scream. When I was a kid in Colorado, I would hike up the mountains and scream. Just let it out.
Kat: Well that is a beautiful story, Jane, but unfortunately this is not Colorado, this is New York City and there is literally nowhere in this entire city where people aren’t always on top of you.

Jacqueline: Alright, Sage. We’ve got your assignment. Porn: Love it or Hate It. It’s clearly something we need to be talking about. Let’s make a feature piece out of it. Which means we need somebody to cover your sex column this month. Jane.
Jane: Oh, uh. Actually, I had a political piece I wanted to pitch that I’m really excited about.
Jacqueline: Well, that can wait. We need a sex column.
Jane: Yeah, but I’m not exactly-
Jacqueline: I know you’re not exactly. That’s why I want you doing it.

Jane: This is like an infection waiting to happen.
Sexologist: Not if you use the right ones and in the right way,
Jane: I don’t really feel comfortable putting a yoni in my… yoni.
Sexologist: Which is exactly why I want you to.

Kat: Can you please tell her to stop being so uptight?
Sexologist: There’s absolutely nothing wrong with being uptight.
Kat: Thank you!
Sexologist: The problem is when you let it hold you back.

Jane: Like, okay, so there’s this one where I’m in a cotton field and there’s this hot soldier and he like rips off my corset. And then I’m like, if I’m Scarlett O’Hara, then that means he’s a confederate soldier, and that means that I’m on the wrong end of the Civil War.
Kat: I appreciate you not being racist in your fantasy, but it’s just a fantasy. You’re supposed to totally give in to whatever.
Jane: Well I’m not a totally give in kind of person. I wish I was.

Kat: [to Jane] These little charts and graphs and stuff are not gonna help you. You gotta do something. You gotta do something crazy.

Jacqueline: So I read your article. I’m just gonna cut to the chase. I need you to take another pass.
Jane: Do you have any specific notes?
Jacqueline: Uh, yeah. You’re holding back. All I see are facts and figures and… where are you?
Jane: I’m at an art gallery. Do you need me to come back?
Jacqueline: No, I mean where are you in this piece?
Jane: I don’t know.
Jacqueline: I don’t want percentages. I want your point of view.
Jane: Those percentages aren’t boring to me. I mean, ten percent of women say they’ve never had an orgasm before and researchers say that number’s probably higher, but no one will admit it and, you know, knowing that I’m not the only one it’s… comforting.
Jacqueline: Jane?
Jane: Look, it’s amazing that women are owning their sexualities in this way that they’ve never been able to before, but for someone like me it’s a lot of pressure to live up to, and even this magazine makes me feel bad about it sometimes. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that.
Jacqueline: I’m gonna do something. I am gonna let you write this article anonymously, but in return, I want the real story. From your heart, not from your head. I wanna know what this is really like for you.

Kat: God, I feel like such an idiot. I just completely misread that whole situation.
Sutton: You’re not an idiot.
Jane: No, you’re not. I mean, you’re the bravest person I know. You take risks and you put yourself out there. I mean, I wish I could be more like you.
Sutton: Yeah. Me too.
Kat: Like I said, you gotta do something crazy.
Jane: I can. And I will.

Jane: Huff Po did a profile on the congresswoman, and it was basically what I was gonna write, excpet they actually got a quote.
Sutton: Oh, man. That’s awful.
Jane: It is what it is. So I’m doing a piece on congressional fashion.
Sutton: Yeah, that’s what I was talking about. That jumpsuit is beyond awful.
Jane: Okay, you’re part of the problem. You should be criticizing her politics, not her pantsuits. I mean, look at these comments. They’re just… mean.
Sutton: A walking popsicle? A Star Trek reject on acid? How much do people suck on the internet this week?
Jane: This was the day that she decided to roll back the Clean Water Act… but instead of talking about that, they’re all talking about this hideous lime green situation. And then she turned around and said that she was being unfairly attacked as a woman, and that became a story.
Sutton: I mean, I would never say this to her, and I would never put it on the internet, but to you I’ll say: that’s a terrible color for an adult. How does she not know that?
Jane: I think she does. Here. “So when I choose an outfit, I’m always thinking, what am I trying to communicate? How can I use fashion to my advantage?
What are you doing?
I’m seeing what she wore when she did that press conference defending the Keystone Pipeline. Ha! It’s hideous.
Sutton: It is hideous.
Jane: She is using fashion as a smokescreen.
Sutton: That’s kind of genius.
Jane: And I have my article.

Jane: Eric.
Eric: Jane. Hi. What are you doing here?
Jane: I’m stalking you.
Eric: I’m confused.
Jane: It’s pretty crappy feeling, isn’t it?

[Jane angrily throws her bag and groans]
Jacqueline: Hello, Jane.
Jane: Jacqueline. I’m so sorry. I didn’t realize you were in here. I’ll get out of your way.
Jacqueline: No, I just wasn’t feeling these shoes sent over for the gala. But it seems like you need this closet a lot more than I do.
Jane: No. No, no. Don’t wear shoes you don’t like because of me. Just forget I was here.
Jacqueline: Jane, what is going on with you?
Jane: Uh, nothing.
Jacqueline: I felt very confident giving you this promotion. But your energy this week has been off. Maybe you’re not quite ready.
Jane: No, I am. I’m ready. And I’m so grateful for this opportunity.
Jacqueline: Good. I’m glad to hear that. So, when am I gonna get some material from you?
Jane: Soon. It’s all there. Well, I found Eric. I’m just having trouble finishing it.
Jacqueline: How can we fix that, then?
Jane: Well I guess I need to talk to him.
Jacqueline: Well, that sounds like a pretty good guess to me. Why haven’t you done that?
Jane: Because it hurts too much.

Audrey Parker (Haven): INFJ

Dominant Introverted Intuition [Ni]: Audrey has amazing instincts, particularly when it comes to figuring out how to deal with the “troubles” in Haven. She often gets struck with strong hunches about what’s causing them and how to deal with them. Audrey can make connections with very little evidence and not concrete proof to back up her assertions. She just knows what to do. It’s part of who she is. Her incredible intuition makes her a very skilled detective and she is uniquely qualified to handle all of the bizarre events that occur in Haven. Even before arriving in Haven, Audrey is open to possibilities and speculation, and prefers an interesting explanation over a realistic one. Agent Howard reprimands her, telling her that the FBI isn’t fictional work. Audrey is so singularly focused on her work that she refuses to take vacations. She constantly seeks to unravel the next mystery. Audrey believes that Marion is controlling the weather, and doesn’t let Nathan’s attempts to convince her otherwise dissuade her. Audrey always follows her gut, and it rarely leads her astray. When it appears that Daniel is being drowned, Nathan tries to stop it, but Audrey makes him back off, allowing him to be submerged. Audrey typically knows when people are keeping things from her. She knows Duke isn’t telling her everything and she will get to the bottom of it.

Auxiliary Extroverted Feeling [Fe]: Empathy is one of Audrey’s most frequently used tactics when it comes to dealing with the troubled residents of Haven. She is able to connect with many of the people she encounters, allowing her to help them. Audrey is able to bond with Cornell Stamoran’s copy because she, like him, has someone else’s memories in her head. She tells him that they are both more than their memories and are capable of being their own people and making decisions for themselves. The connection she establishes with him ultimately inspires him to do the right thing. She can also be emotionally manipulative, and admits that she was simultaneously sincere and playing him. Audrey is sensitive to other people’s feelings and, though she is very tough-minded, she is also good at getting through to people with a warm, gentle touch. She is emotional and being in touch with other people’s feelings, as well as her own, allows her to be good at her job and allows her to see what’s going on with people beneath the surface. Audrey senses the feelings between Marion and Conrad, and meddles, telling him that Marion will need someone to keep her calm, since getting upset triggers her trouble, effectively nudging the two together. Even though Nathan doesn’t say it, she is immediately able to tell that he doesn’t want to go to Jess. Audrey cares intensely about others. She tells Nathan that when she was growing up in an orphanage, everyone else hoped for rich, famous parents, but Audrey just wished that her mother would pull up in a big bus and bring all of the other kids home to their families.

Tertiary Introverted Thinking [Ti]: It isn’t enough for Audrey to solve cases. She also wants to understand the hows and the whys. She’s highly inquisitive and seeks to fully comprehend whatever she’s up against as best she can. She doesn’t get hung up on the facts, and typically works around them. Audrey is very good at coming to logical conclusions about whatever goes on around her. When she’s stuck repeating the same day over and over again, she receives an injury, but when she wakes up, she still has it, leading her to believe that if she died during the time loop, she would stay dead, unlike everybody else. Audrey is skilled at pointing out other people’s flaws in logic. When Chris wants to go charging out into the street while the police station is on lockdown, he tries to convince her that nobody will want to shoot him because his trouble makes everybody adore him, to which she asks what he thinks his trouble will work faster than a person with a gun. When everyone else in the town is under the delusion that it’s Christmas (even though it’s July), Audrey tries to apply logic to convince everyone that it’s not Christmas. Why would Santa wear that hot, heavy suit if Christmas were in July? Be rational.

Inferior Extroverted Sensing [Se]: Audrey is unafraid of taking risks and acting in the moment, though sometimes she has trouble being fully aware of her physical environment. When she is driving into Haven, she is busy fiddling with her radio and doesn’t notice the cracks in the road until it’s nearly too late, causing her to swerve off of the road and almost drive off a cliff. Audrey lacks Nathan’s level of caution, and intentionally tries to get a person who she believes is troubled angry in order to trigger it because she wants to either prove that he’s behind it, or rule him out as a possibility.

Enneagram: 6w7 2w1 8w9 Sx/So


Howard: FBI is non-fiction work. I need you to keep it that way.
Audrey: Is this about Miami?
Howard: Oh, yeah. I’m talking about Miami. We’ve been through this.
Audrey: You know, being open to possibilities is how we close cases… Like that one.
Howard: It sends you down blind alleys, too.
Audrey: Yeah, well where I grew up, a blind alley was even better than reality. So… where are you sending me this time?

Audrey: [pulls out her gun] Whoa! FBI! Who are you?
Nathan: Haven PD. Who are you?
Audrey: FBI. Are you deaf?
Nathan: How do I know that?
Audrey: Okay, well, for starters, I’m wearing the gun on my belt. It’s a government-issue 9mm. And they gave me, you know, one of these. [She reaches into her jacket, then stops when Nathan protests.]
Nathan: Hey, keep your hands where I can see them.
Audrey: Okay, what am I going to do? Pull out another gun?

Audrey: When you’ve ruled everything else out, you have to accept what’s left.

Audrey: Can you feel fire?
Nathan: No.
Audrey: Ice?
Nathan: Oddly enough, yes, I can feel ice.
Audrey: You can feel ice?
Nathan: No.

Audrey: You can deny that strange things are going on around here, but we need to hit the Rev and we need to hit him hard.

Nathan: What if you had gotten him mad and something happened?

Nathan: I’ll see her tomorrow.
Audrey: You don’t wanna go.

Audrey: We have something very important in common. Henry didn’t witness your crime. He witnessed his.
Cornell: My crimes are his crimes.
Audrey: Why? Because he remembers doing them? We’re not just the sum total of our memories, are we?
Cornell: What does it matter?
Audrey: It matters to me. And it matters to him. If you kill us now, all you’re going to remember is having to clean up after him. Or you can have your own memory. A memory of saving a boy’s life.
Cornell: About time. Kill her.
Cornell’s Copy: You know what you’re asking of me?
Audrey: I’m giving you a chance… to have what I had. A chance to make my own life. A chance to save lives, not end them. This may be the only one you get.

Duke: Did you mean everything you said to Cornell or were you just playing him?
Audrey: Both, I guess. He needed to move past his memories so he could learn what he was capable of.

Audrey: You’re a scientist. What works faster – your trouble or a bullet?

Audrey: If Christmas were in July, then why would Santa wear such a warm suit?